Accused of Being Petty and Scrooge Like

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-12-2011
Accused of Being Petty and Scrooge Like
25
Mon, 12-26-2011 - 2:43pm

For the pass 25 years my 2 sisters and I who reside in the same state have had our own family tradition of spending Xmas together.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-10-2000
Fri, 01-13-2012 - 12:41pm

No, you are not a Scrooge.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-12-2011
Mon, 01-09-2012 - 8:51pm

The kids were not there either. It was their grandmother who asked for the money to take to them. If they had been there then I would have given the money to them as I always have in the past.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2012
Sat, 01-07-2012 - 1:22am

If it was the adults that didnt show up at the house, then I wouldn't give the money out either. But for the kids I would give it to them. They can't help the way adults act, so maybe you should bend the rules for the kids sake.

www.findingfreedomteam.com/ KLittle
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-19-2004
Thu, 01-05-2012 - 8:25pm

I agree w/ your POV.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-12-2011
Thu, 12-29-2011 - 12:30am

Yes, these are the same kids that were bullying my son. Have they stopped? Yes and no, the last time they saw him over their grandmother's they brought up the bullying incident and told him he was a baby and tattle tale. To be honest my niece and her kids have rubbed me the wrong way for years and I had let a lot of things go for the sake of preserving the family relationship.

Her kids tormented my son

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2009
Wed, 12-28-2011 - 7:53pm
<< It's all noble to say that you aren't expecting a gift and just their company is enough blah blah blah but frankly that just isn't how it goes. >>

Actually, that "is" how it goes in certain places. I guess not where you and the OP live, nor in your circles... but here in my rural part of Texas, and the people I hang with, that "is" how it goes.

<< I wouldn't go to a wedding or baby shower and not bring a gift for the same reasons. >>

We don't generally take gifts to the wedding, but instead they are given in advance or afterwards.

To each their own, I guess. But for for me, I'd never look down on a child who came to another child's b.d. party without a gift, nor their parents. Lots of us truly do care only about their showing up to celebrate with us, not a tit-for-tat attitude.

Maybe you consider that noble, and maybe it is.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-08-2009
Wed, 12-28-2011 - 5:53pm

I agree that it is extremely tacky to show up to a child's birthday party and not bring a gift.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-29-2002
Wed, 12-28-2011 - 12:50pm

Given the information you provided, I most likely would have not put together the gifts as well.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2004
Wed, 12-28-2011 - 10:32am
Whether or not you chose to give a gift is your personal decision. I'm just wondering if you really didn't give the gift because you didn't want to and if you are using their not being there as the "excuse". Do you only give Xmas gifts to those who come to your Xmas party? If so, then ok but if that isn't a requirement for all of your gift giving then just be honest & tell your sister that you decided not to give her grandkids gifts this year as their Mother is rude & rarely provides gifts in return.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-12-2011
Tue, 12-27-2011 - 8:43pm

I was

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