Advice on my Serial Dating Friend??
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Advice on my Serial Dating Friend??
| Tue, 11-30-2010 - 12:48pm |
One of my oldest and dearest friends has begun to drive me mad lately.
We don't see each other as often as we would like since we live several hours apart and both have full time jobs.
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Oh man, you are friends with my sister's twin.
I feel for you.
"I told her that I didn't think it was a good idea, but that I would always support her decisions."
Sometimes being a good friend to someone means not supporting decisions of that someone.
Liz
Clinical Research Associate
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http://www.
I think a lot of us have a friend like this. I have a friend for 15 years. For the past 15 years, she's dated nothing... and I mean nothing but losers. They are either married or do "recreational" drugs or they hit her... take your pick. Sometimes they do all three. Oh and I forgot one thing at least two of these bottom - feeding low lifes did, they couldn't hold a job, lived with her and didn't contribute a dime. After years of bailing her out of messes that these scum buckets caused, I told her, "I love you, but I can't listen to this anymore. I can't bail you out of messes. I have my own life". When she tries to regale me with her latest tale of woe, I remind what I said.
I guess I just don't understand this. I've never been a girl that HAD to have a boyfriend; I am happily married now and have been for almost 2 years, but I didn't take a whole lot before that.
You're in a tough spot. If you coddle her, you'll have to hear about the same problems over and over. I'm going through this now. But no one can talk anyone out of choosing the wrong guys. It's funny how the girls who always want to be in a relationship never end up getting married (the very thing they want more than anything). They think a bad boyfriend is better than no boyfriend. I can't figure this out either.
I know I'm coddling her, but my friends that have tried the "tough love" with her, she's pretty much shut them out and I don't want that to happen.--staciowen
You realize that if you keep handling the situation the same way, you'll likely get the same results that you say you don't want, right?
Maybe the only reason she's still acting coddled and pursuing the dating drama is because this is the way she's learned to get coddling from you.
Liz
Clinical Research Associate
-------------------------------------------------
http://www.
You realize that if you keep handling the situation the same way, you'll likely get the same results that you say you don't want, right?
Liz is right. If she has no friends left, maybe she'll have an epiphany that she's going about things the wrong way. She can't be "right", while everyone else is "wrong". My friend also says, "I don't understand why, no one wants to talk to me about (insert man of the week here)". I tell her "because everyone's sick of hearing about you making the same mistakes". If she shuts you out, let her. She'll come around, when she has her wake up call.
I have a friend who dated this guy for TWO WHOLE WEEKS, then became furious and turned psycho on him because he wasn't coming over every single night.