Asking to much from grown upkids? (women over 50 please)

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-22-2004
Asking to much from grown upkids? (women over 50 please)
11
Sat, 11-24-2012 - 12:28am

Las year was my, 60th aniverssary. Decade birthdays have always been important for me.

My daughter wasn´t able to be with me, because she broke with her boyfriend, and was so sad, that she decided to take a trip. When she came back, I never received a present (eventhough she makes very good money) Or her intention to buy a cake. I GOT NOOOOOOOOOTHING!

My son lives in foreingh country and was also unable to be with me, but he sent me some money as a present, and callled for my birthday.

The next time the family got together, (me and my two kids.) I was waitting for them to acknowledge my birthady. Probably that they could buy a cake, and sang happy birthday. But that never happened. I also found out that my son (whom I rarely see), after his brief visit to our country, took some time to attend to a friend´s wedding in South America. I just saw him departute thinking "¿WHAAAAAAAAAT?"

This, besides other things have really broken my heart as a mom.

Am I asking for too much? Is that the way grown up kids behave with their moms? Are my kids extremely selfish? Sometimes I have the feeling; that I did something wrong! In the way I brought them up, or they just inherit from their dad (whom I dovorced) the "SELFISH" gene.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-22-2004

I think that what happened is that your DD listen to all the bad things your DH said of her. Now, he is the enemy for all of them. They have made their lives, and I guess you have a right to have one.

I´m the OP, and I´m struggling with my issues. I know grown up kids want sometimes to control their mother´s life. My daughter is almost like my mother (controlling) and the final thing she decided to control me, was saying I wasn´t allowed to see my grandson. Guess she got a big surprised because I said "That´s ok", and I didn´t contact her anymore.

We women are sometimes controlled by our parents, them by our husbands and at the end our grown up kids.

Not sure what will happen in my life, but I won´t let my kids control mine!

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