BFF betrayed me

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-25-2010
BFF betrayed me
10
Mon, 10-25-2010 - 11:38am

Ill try to make this as short as possible. The guy I was with for 3 years (known for 10) and was once engaged to lives in my basement for financial reason. Our relationship is over but we try to be friends because we have mutual debt. He knows I will never be with him again because he is a liar and cheater. Enter my best friend. I tell her all my secrets, cry about the ex, and Im always there for her. A few months ago I was warned that she and my ex were looking like they were getting close...She has sworn she would never do that. Says she has my back. Says hes not her type....she is also married but has cheated on her husband at least 2 times that I know of. She has always said that if ex said anything or did anything she would certainly tell me. Blah blah blah. I discovered last week that they had exchanged numbers and have been texting. Because ex and i have cheap phones, I am unable to get the cell spy that would forward all their texts to me. Just because i dont know whats in them does not mean this is ok. She should have told me right away and she should not be returning his texts. Sometimes there are 15 in a day. She knows how I feel about this because she was sooo supportive when another girl was texting him and agreed with me that it was inappropriate.

I am so upset with her. A friend should not be with your ex ...especially if she says she would never do that. The texting thing is how I caught him 4 times. That is why he is my ex. She makes me physically sick. I havent eaten in 4 days. I want to bust her out, but I am waiting for more evidence. I told her I never go onling and check the bill anymore cuz I dont care what he does. She will hang herself by keeping this up. I dont care what he does, just not with my friend!

Dont you think she is a piece of crap??? I needed to vent. I am so depressed that she would do this to me. Its very hard to keep quiet cuz I can barekly stand to look at her or talk to her. I cant wait to show the bill to her husband too. I dont think he will do anything. He stayed with her after the last guy. But i just want everyone to know what she is....Im going to post the copies everywhere at work and give them to her mom and mother in law too.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2007
Mon, 10-25-2010 - 12:18pm

This is not going to be what you want to hear, but here goes.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2009
Mon, 10-25-2010 - 12:45pm

I completely agree with Ohearto.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-24-2004
Mon, 10-25-2010 - 12:48pm

K3Rock,

Welcome to the board. I hope you come back and vent anytime. We're here to offer support and advice, so don't take this the wrong way.

Yes, I think both of your friends are acting like turds right now, but if I were in your shoes, I would tell her, "you want to be with that loser and wreck your marriage because of him, then go ahead. You can have him". The reason I say this is because, neither of them are worth your time and you shouldn't let them take up free rent in your head. You also don't want him back, so I too am wondering why you care if they do hook up? You know the guy is not

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2003
Mon, 10-25-2010 - 12:51pm

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2009
Mon, 10-25-2010 - 1:03pm
>>>Finally, don't tell the husband. Not while he's in your basement, especially.>>>

What an excellent point!

I was in "kinda" a similar situation when a relative was having an affair with a married woman. We lived on the same property, and when the husband found out, all hell broke loose. I had to flee with my then 11 y.o. son. (she's dead puppy chick, if that tells you anything more you needed to know..)

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-29-2002
Mon, 10-25-2010 - 1:15pm

I can totally understand you wanting to confront her on this.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2003
Mon, 10-25-2010 - 1:16pm

Yuck, yeah, I read about that dead puppy incident.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2003
Mon, 10-25-2010 - 1:18pm

I agree.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-25-2010
Mon, 10-25-2010 - 1:50pm

OMG I just typed a big thing and then hit cancel instead of post! Grrr! Well, Ill try to come back later and post again. For now let me just say thanks to all of you!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-29-2002
Mon, 10-25-2010 - 2:55pm

The DH has already proven he condones the cheating, by sticking around after the first two times.

I see the biggest issue being that BFF comes for solace, and finds herself locked out in the cold.

I do agree getting the Ex out of the basement is a good idea.

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