Hi I have a problem that I am hoping someone can help me with before I go crazy! My little brother and I (I am 25 & He is 21) have always been very close. I just found out that his on again off again girlfriend (She just turned 18)is pregnant. They broke up because she was not faithful to him. She had a rough home life and my parents let her live with them through the last year of high school. I do feel very sorry for her because of her home life or lack there of a home life. My little brother, Eric, has stated that he knows (or is pretty sure?) the baby is his. He doesn't want to get married because he does see a baby as a reason to stay with someone that he can't really live with. She has been chasing him like crazy and he has just been seeing her on and off. Then "boom" she gets pregnant. Eric wants to do the right thing. My mom is so mad it's not even funny. When they told her the news her first words were "you are going to have an abortion right?". No matter the situation I thought this was a pretty crude thing for my mom to say. I know by law they are both adults but Eric wants me to be some sort of stability through this because my parents are so p.o.'d about it. I am very stable in my life and don't think I can have children so I have offered to adopt the baby and raise it. Eric says this girl will never go for this idea. She is already discussing child support, which Eric says will not be a problem. He has a great job and I feel will provide for his child.
Here is my problem. How do I provide support to him without seeming judgemental. No, I am not sure it is his due to her past but I want to be there for him since my parents are so againist him. I would want someone to understand if this had happened to me when I was his age.
Please someone help. I feel like I have to referee this battle. I don't want to take sides but I can't leave Eric all by himself as much as I want to say it's not my problem. We are just too close for me to do that to him. I don't like this girl but I feel like that is not my choice. How can I convience my mom that being mad about something she can't change will only make things much worse? Or am I wrong for trying to make things better?