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|Thu, 01-09-2014 - 12:09pm|
I am 63 years old I have recently started couseling because I was diagnosised with diabetes/depression. When my dr asked me if I was motivated to lose weight I broke down in tears and told her I was tired of losing and gaining the same (50 to 80 lbs)every 5 to 6 years. She asked me if I was bulimic. Yes, I can down a pan of brownies no problem. I can't seem to control my craving for sweets. I am a healthcare professional and know intellectually what I need to do but my emotions and cravings drive me to sugar . She asked me if I felt I needed couseling. I agreed to go.. My mother died of cancer when I was 8. My brother died at age 20 due to heart problems when I was 10. My father died from blood clot when I was 13. During a span of 6 yers I also lost my grandmother, grandfather , uncle and cousin. We as children (I have 3 sisters) were not encouraged to talk about our situation. We were expected to carry on as nothing happened. Now it's taking a toll on me. Please allow your children/family to grieve and talk about their situation during a loss. Get counseling for them if they have difficulty coping. I am sure my situation cost me two marriages and an inability to be myself. I am a middle child, a people pleaser and overachiever. I will continue to go to couseling to find myself..
IThere is so much more that happened during my childhood that has contibuted to the emotional turmoil I am dealing with today but I am hopeful with proper medication and counseling the remaining time I have on this earth will be more peaceful and enjoyable. I am so blessed to have wonderful children, grandchildren , and my sister but they have never seen the real me. I put on my mask and act like i think they want to see me act.. If you have been thru something similar and have any advice for me I would like to hear from you. I know there are many people who deal with loss everyday.