Did I do the right thing?
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|Tue, 10-30-2012 - 12:25pm|
I'm new to this particular board. I just needed to vent and I am very interested in hearing any response good or bad.
I finally had a breakdown today and feel I've made the right decision. Maybe I am acting like a child but it feels right for once.
My kid's aunt (my ex sister in law, but we remained friends so to speak) keeps playing what appears to be mind games with
my two kids. She's done this for years and it has gradually gotten worse and worse. What she does is call here and speak
to the kids saying that she will come by and take them out, have a sleepover at her house, etc, and the kids get all excited
about this and as of the past year especially, this aunt calls last minute saying she cannot see them. Always calls and
always makes plans and ALWAYS breaks them. We only saw her one time this past year, which was back in May.
What kind of person keeps doing this? I understand things come up, but she has lied about some of them. There are
times where she says she had to work unexpectedly, go to the doctors, go to a wedding when in fact I've found out
she was spending time hanging out with her friends partying or seeing other family members. She always goes out
of her way to see the other niece and nephew, who live out of state. In fact, about 3 weeks ago she spoke with my
son telling him that she wanted to visit at the end of this month, but what do you know? She doesn't come and sees the
other family / friends instead. She will call once or twice a month, every month, makes plans, and cancel them. I thought
I was doing good by letting my kids speak with their aunt when she calls, but I think it is just hurting them more.
Now onto the childish part on my end. Already being angered by the whole situation, what ultimately did me in was (trust
me I hate to say it) Facebook. She and I have been friends on there for quite some time. But, after seeing all of the
pictures of her hanging out with other friends and family, and some posted only hours ago, I deleted her from friends.
She probably won't even notice that for the next few months to a year.
Oh yeah, one day my son shocked even myself and got a hold of his aunt and told her how he felt. He basically said that
his feelings were hurt and he is sad when she makes plans and breaks them and that he really wanted to see her. He
asked why she does this all the time. Well, of course there wasn't a good excuse.
So now she is off of my Facebook and her number is blocked. It might sound bad but it finally feels good and a relief now.
I know you shouldn't shut out your family, but she did this to herself, IMO. I am in no way hoping she comes crawling back.
I hope she doesn't. I can't believe she can do that to a 7 and 10 year old.
That's pretty much all of it. Has anyone been in the same shoes? How did this work out for you? Has that person come
back eventually or never to this day?
Thank you for you time!