Do I just let her go?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-05-2008
Do I just let her go?
15
Thu, 04-28-2011 - 12:28am

Please read my previous post, "Shocked," for the background information.

Over Christmas this past year, my former best friend seemed to want to rekindle things.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2003
Thu, 04-28-2011 - 12:45am

Let her go.

She's been incredibly immature and overly involved in your relationship.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-29-2002
Thu, 04-28-2011 - 10:50am

If there is a history of abuse, then I would have to side with your friend.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-22-2011
Thu, 04-28-2011 - 11:00am

In 9 years, the only thing he ever did was throw a small rubber ball (dog toy) at the closet door when I was on the other side of it (it was a hall closet).

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-29-2002
Thu, 04-28-2011 - 11:52am

I can understand your point.

But in defense of your friend, she has a friend, based on her perspective; who is in an abusive relationship.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-22-2011
Thu, 04-28-2011 - 11:56am

I really appreciate your honest perspective.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2009
Thu, 04-28-2011 - 2:25pm
I remember your story well. (I once again can't make paragraphs, so hang with me.) Your fiance was rightfully very upset and worried. He reacted badly. I believe you when you say nothing like him throwing a ball has happened in 9 years. I'd be surprised if not a quite a few people on this board have busted a plate or something in anger. <<< Your friend has way overreacted and been no friend at all. Her constant going on and on about it to others is just weird, even if someone were involved in a terribly abusive relationship. I've had friends that were in pretty emotionally/alcoholic SO's relationships, but I didn't spread it all around. I cut ties with one friend, but I'd spent around 25 years listening to true stories of abuse. And her constant defending him. << In your situation, she's immature and not a friend.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2009
Thu, 04-28-2011 - 2:32pm
I can't edit today, either. What I meant to say is alot of people do something stupid in anger on a very rare occasion (like bust a plate), that hurts nobody and isn't repeated. Hope that makes sense!

 

Avatar for lizmvr
Community Leader
Registered: 06-06-2001
Thu, 04-28-2011 - 6:42pm

Sure, let her go, but you have posted here before about more than the rubber toy being thrown.

Liz


Clinical Research Associate


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http://www.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-22-2011
Thu, 04-28-2011 - 7:13pm

I think there's been a lot of immaturity in our relationship since we've

Avatar for lizmvr
Community Leader
Registered: 06-06-2001
Thu, 04-28-2011 - 8:30pm
I don't think that mental illness and immaturity are all overcome in a couple of months. I didn't suggest that you leave your fiance, but you've questioned that fairly recently yourself.

http://forums.ivillage.com/t5/Explore-iVillage/Do-I-leave-just-for-the-sake-of-leaving/td-p/116951749/highlight/true

You don't have to take any advice you're given or agree with everyone that posts repsonses to your questions, but it doesn't help you to read negativity into them either.

Liz


Clinical Research Associate


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http://www.

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