I have this friend that I've known my whole life.
Clinical Research Associate
First of all, you can’t “make words matter to her”.
As far as her smoking and eating healthy, that’s up to her.
She said she was coming to the funeral but she never showed up never called to say anything.
thank you for your replies. i appreciate it.
You don't need that crap. Find another friend, like me ;)
Well, I wouldn't let her smoking/eating habits bother you - it's a little annoying when people say one thing and do another but oh well, it's not your life, don't let it get to you. The other issues, however, definitely suggest that she is not a very good friend. She's inconsiderate, thoughtless, and not there for you when you need her. She doesn't seem to care much for your feelings. But everyone else has said, you can't change her or force something to matter to her.I would just stop making an effort to be friends with her. Stop initiating any contact with her and if she contacts you, don't feel like you have to make a big effort to converse or get together. You don't have to cut ties with her completely or be rude to her - there doesn't have to be another falling out. But just allow yourselves to drift apart over time - I have a feeling she's not the type of person to make a strong effort to remain close with people anyway so I think if you let go a little bit, you'll naturally drift apart.