How can I convince my sister to use her wheelchair?

Do you think maybe something like I have might help? Normally I use a cane. However on really bad days or somewhere I am going to be walking I have a wheeled walker. You can use it like a push cane, it has a seat and storage basket underneath it. It has a storage pack on the back as well.

With it she can alternate walking and sitting. Someone could push her, she might could push the wheels or the cheat I do sometimes when dh and I are too far apart-I use my cane to pull or push it.

You might try coming from the angle of with her not exhausted you would have more time to enjoy xyz together. Just make sure to use a lot of "I" statements. Speaking for myself and a few disabled friends I know, often something that is supposed to be meant as 'help' comes out and across as criticizing and hurtful. Not all of us mind you but wanted to let you know your sis may be one of us.

I know all about not wanting to admit having limitations and constantly learning new ones as your body changes. ( I am under 50 and have a host of conditions, problems and more while my 88 year old neighbor has been sick three days in her entire life, stills tends cattle and cuts hay. I can't even play much with my grandkids)

Explain to her you feel that if she used the wheelchair she would be handicapable not handicapped. And that you are concerned for her safety after all those injuries and don't want her to have more. Also I would talk to her therapist if you can and see if she might have BPV (vertigo) in addition to the stroke. That could contribute to the balance issue on top of the stroke damage.

Madeleine,

Hi. I have empathy for you because my elderly Mother is the same way.

Reading your post brought tears to my eyes. While I have never dealt with the issue of stroke, I do know what it is like not to be able to do the things you want to, but sure be able to remember when you could! I have rheumatoid arthritis, and for me it is the dreaded handicap hang tag for my car...that really draws attention. It seems so simple that if I use it, I can park up close, saving myself some days of less pain/slowness etc etc. Many times I have argued with my 14 year old daughter on why I should use it. With her getting frustrated, and not understanding the embarrassment I feel. In my mind those spaces should be saved for individuals such as your sister! Even when there are days I can hardly get out of my own car. I do understand your sister, her stubborness at wanting to be *normal* like she used to be before her stroke. I also understand you as a caregiver, worried for her safety, because you love her. I'm afraid this is something she may have to come to terms on her own. It isn't something that can be forced. I'm sorry, I know it is difficult to understand when your mobility isn't limited or impacted on a daily basis.