I know i should be happy but....

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
I know i should be happy but....
2
Mon, 06-23-2003 - 1:02pm
im not. My Aunt graduated from college this week past week. Im happy for her. I sent her an e-card since im really bad about going to the post office. She sent one back and said thanks for the card then proceeded to tell me the name of everyone who came to her party.

I guess im happy that she graduated BUT im jealous that she has family.

We never lived near my relatives and only had a relationship with them by phone. They pretty much remembered our b-days and such and we remembered theirs. I guess i wish i had an extended family. I dont get along with my mom...well we get along better now i live 6000miles away :) and i have no relationship with my brother or father. DH is an only child and he has no cousins. Actually he has a total of 4 relatives: MIL, GMIL, Uncle W and Aunt B)

Now after hearing about all the cousins, aunts, uncles etc that went to her party i feel so depressed and jealous. I know realistically that I would hate having all those people in my life so i dont understand why i feel this way. Any theories? Maybe its just the grass is greener syndrome :)

Thanks for letting me get that out!

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2003
Mon, 06-23-2003 - 6:50pm
Hi,

It's difficult not to wonder what having a "nice" family would be like. I think we all want to live like the Bradys or Cleavers.

Now that I've been posting on this board, I see that our situations really aren't that different. There are a lot of people without close families. And those that do talk to their families have a lot of strained relationships.

The best advice I've seen so far, is start your own family and raise them with family values and try to be there for them and create a bond that your family never learned. Or enjoy and value your friendships, "family" doesn't necessarily have to mean biologically related.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Tue, 06-24-2003 - 3:15am
Thanks :) That is always a good piece of advice.

I guess the family of myself, DH and the cat will have to do. Im over it now but at the time it sort of felt like she was rubbing it in. I know she was only sharing more of her happiness after all she lost a lot of family too. In the last year her DH and sister that she was closest to (practically raised) both passed away. She and the sister were like Bert and Ernie in our minds, probably because ones name was Alberta, but also because they were so close.