I was a victim of Target Child Selection - I hate my "family"

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-23-2000
I was a victim of Target Child Selection - I hate my "family"
9
Wed, 04-04-2012 - 11:14am

There is a form of child abuse just being recognised recently, it is called : Target Child Selection

Researchers are now discovering that this is probably the most common form of child abuse as it is the easiest to hide.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-05-2008

WOW....I just felt like I read my life story....

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-23-2000

Good for you Shorty!

It may take a while for you to rid yourself of the need to be understood and accepted by your family.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2003

I don't think it's trashy at all to remove toxic, blood sucking family from your life.

I did it three years ago as well and I am happier for it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-23-2000

Well said!

Avatar for deenow17
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2004
I'm so sorry this happened to you & thankful that at least you have the neighbour to love you in your early days.

Just wanted to say that there doesn't need to be actual abuse to have a version of this occur. My DH is the middle child but in his house he wasn't the trouble maker but rather the good one, the one who never caused any trouble, the one who needed no support & the one who always did was what right. In other words, he was the one they justified ignorning with these comments while the other 4 kids "needed" their parents. It's sad but he missed out on the love & attention his siblings got and it has made his role as a parent very challenging. He had clothes, food & shelter but raised himself. His parents said that he was rarely ever home even as a small child. He suffers from being jealous of the attention his kids have gotten, then gets angry at himself for feeling this way as he is a loving & generous father who at 60 is still dealing with being excluded from his family because he "doesn't" need them.

Dee
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-23-2000

That is very interesting and another common problem.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2011
jackhaley wrote:

AND usually the siblings who were taken care of by the parents were NOT the ones who provided help or showed any concern for the parents.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-05-2008
I agree! we could probably get along great mp1983!
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2011
shorty8383 wrote:
I agree! we could probably get along great mp1983!


haha considering my nickname all my life was Shorty