Mcassella - I am so sorry for your loss

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Mcassella - I am so sorry for your loss
Mon, 09-15-2003 - 9:06am

I just read your post below. I am so sorry to hear that your husband has passed. I hope that you can take comfort in knowing that he is out of pain. I know this is a sad time for you. Your children need you as well. Please try to take some time for yourself and allow yourself to experience the emotions that are inside. It is okay to feel sad and angry and relieved and nervous and all at the same time.

I know that you feel your friends are not there for you in this time when you really need them. I also know from experience that some people just do not know how to support a friend. Help them support you, tell them what you need. Call up a friend and just tell her that you need to relive some of the good memories from your time together. Then she will know that it is okay to talk about him. Call up a friend and say that you can't possiblily find the energy to cook supper tonight, could she bring something over so that your kids can eat. Call a friend and say that you just need to be alone for awhile, could she be there for the kids while you get away. I wish you had a support system that would know what you need without having to say it. But it sounds like maybe you have people in your life but they just don't know what to do for you.

You are in my prayers and you are welcome to post here and share your feelings.


iVillage Member
Registered: 05-25-2003
Tue, 09-16-2003 - 10:46am
Thank you for your encouragement and well wishes. You do not know how much I appreciate it. My kids and I are doing amazingly well. I am a very positive person so I know I can handle anything that comes my way. During the week my husband had his heart attack in May, I was taking college finals of my first semester. I am going to college now because I want a better future for my girls. I just never dreamed all of this would happen so soon. My husband has had health issues for years as you saw in my post. I just thought we had at least ten more years.

Regarding support, I have had hurt feelings. I have never went through anything like this before. I have not received any cards or calls from anyone. I received two cards, one from the doctor and the other from hospice. I just wanted to know that they thought about us. But I will get through this like everything else, positively fine.

Life is what you make it and I am not letting these people get us down.

Thanks again for your support. It does feel good to vent even though it is to people I do not know.