mind if i vent about a friend?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-10-2003
mind if i vent about a friend?
Wed, 12-17-2003 - 1:31pm
she's like a sister and i consider her family-perhaps thats why i am getting so fed up with her sh*t...

shes always making plans, and never showing up, or forgetting to cancel, never calls, emails, NOTHING

whats worse is she wont even mention it, like im supposed to forget

we have been friends for 15+ years-and im starting to think its too long

we have a mutual frind, whose hosting a party coming up-we were both invited, but neither of us were given the location or time-plus we cant get in touch with her-so to be honest-im doubtful we are going, as it is with her record of f'n me over id assumed id be stood up anyway

so i voiced my concern about the lack of information, and the potential weather situation (driving 2+ hours in the snow) and shes making it out that i am a bad friend-that i obviously dont want to go etc

its one thing to have a friend you can rely on, but can i? meanwhile, the girl hosting the party-everytime we make arrangements to see her my other friends forgets, or last minute decides to hang with her ex, she SWEARS she calls the girl to cancel-shes lying

no one can miss every call or email-5 or 6 separate occasions

FED UP! truly

Avatar for cl_2and1more
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Wed, 12-17-2003 - 2:49pm

Your friend sounds like she is a very inconsiderate person.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-10-2003
Wed, 12-17-2003 - 3:00pm
thanks for the suggestions :o)

what truly gets me is that her mood is dependant solely upon how her exfiance is treating her-they are kinda together, who knows, that is her deal and i respect it. but it galls me to no end because she does this with EVERYTHING...i have learned not to depend upon her-and i ALWAYS have a backup plan. it sucks but 9 out of 10 she is unreliable. she then has the NERVE to say she doesnt know me anymore, that i spend all my time with my bf (whom i live with so YES i do see him daily), and that ive lost my individuality. btw im pregnant, so ive been busy working extra for extra cash, have drs appts etc. who knows anymore. anyone know how to go about finding a job in another state and relocating? bf and i have decided to up and leave, start a new life and all...just dont know where to start...perhaps then i will learn to better appreciate time spent with her and others who are just as bad...

Avatar for leslie2353
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 12-17-2003 - 6:50pm
She's probably feeling as frustrated as you, so she don't give a sh@t. She just doesn't know how to tell it to you 'gently'. My best friend of 25yrs. and I broke up, just not answering mails or messages by phone, because, like your friend she acts like her. She is back to her normal self in person, as if NOTHING HAD HAPPENED. But, I got tired of it, and left her alone. She had the audacity to invite me to her party, when she doesn't even come to mine. What gives? Time to step back and let go, girlfriend.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-16-2001
Wed, 12-17-2003 - 7:30pm

I can tell you from personal experience that this whole situation won't be worth it after awhile.

I had a BEST FRIEND for a about 12 years and when we would make plans to do something she was late 95% of time.

CL for 11 years