Need advice about a loan gone wrong
Find a Conversation
|Fri, 06-27-2003 - 4:47am|
Now, 2 years later, my mum's told me he's been complaining to her and other relatives that I didn't repay him. Apparently he and his wife have been making snide remarks that I must be involved in something bad (ie: prostitution) because I needed the money. I'm upset he told her about the loan because he promised me he wouldn't. The reason I went to him for a loan and not my parents was because at the time, my parents always told me I owed them big time for being a financial burden - while forbidding me to get a part-time job! (They don't dare do this now). If I'd asked my parents for a loan, they would've initially said it was a gift, then used it as "proof" that I was incapable of living independently. I felt if I borrowed from my uncle, I would need to repay the loan and thus not owe him.
I want to speak to my uncle directly about what he's allegedly said about me, but that's where it gets messy. Mum wanted me to bring up the loan at family dinner in front of everyone - she thought witnesses would be a good idea to shut my uncle's wife up. But I refused because it was crass and should be between me and him only. She got angry,then phoned my uncle to clarify the money was a gift. Later she came to my house in tears and claimed HE got angry and shouted "It's a gift alright! Don't worry about it!" and he slammed down the phone. They're brother and sister and things haven't been good between them since then.
So what should I do? Should I pay him back regardless? I hate people who only help others so they can say "You owe me something for what I've done for you". If this is my uncle's tack, I'll pay him back ASAP. OTOH I figure if my uncle had misgivings about the loan, he would've spoken to me directly. I don't know if my mum's version of events is completely true, but if I ask my uncle about it I risk making a bad situation worse.
ps: My uncle has 2 teenage boys and I'm seriously considering giving the money to them!