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|Mon, 05-26-2003 - 6:18am|
Next, they started spending money. Vacations, new clothes, 3 sets of lawn furniture, etc. Mom pays for everything, including all household expenses.
My sister was working but a couple of months ago, she switched to part time, saying she was going to apply for disability to make up the rest of her normal income. She cashed out her retirement and bought a new wardrobe, a trip to Hawaii, etc.
About 3 years ago, a bf gave my sister a male and 3 female dogs. She's been breedng them regularly and selling them. Mom was cleaning the pens and caring for the puppies but didn't get any of the money. Now, my sister has decided to go into the kennel business. My mom bought at least $10,000 worth of puppies for my sister. It's not my understanding that this was a loan but a gift. Mom converted a building on her property to a kennel, adding chain link fencing, drainage, etc. Since then, they've bought even more dogs but Mom says my sister paid for those. There are about 25 puppies there now, all under 7 months so it will be a year or more before any money is realized.
My other sister and I have tried to talk to Mom when this got started. She would seem to understand our concerns but then would confide in the sister she lives with. That sister would then convince her that we were only concerned that she was spending our "inheritance" so Mom got all upset and borderline hysterical. Mom, btw, is easily led and does what she's told if it's the easiest. Dad knew it as well as how manipulative this sister is and tried to protect Mom. To get the money for the dogs, Mom says she uses money from her business, which should be closed at her age. However, I really don't think she earns enough from there to pay it.
I've also had mom confess to having been paying my sister's bills and loaning her money. I know that some of this is on her credit cards and her home equity loan. My sister isn't known for repaying loans.
My other sister and I are in a quandry. She lives nearby but has kids, including a disabled one. I'm quite a distance away and are looking at moving further for job reasons. A year or so ago, we almost moved near Mom but my sister got upset and we got met with quite a battle. Our plan had been to have me there to take care of mom and my DH would commute on weekends.
There's nothing that I see I can do. Mom is alert enough that I couldn't take it to court to protect her. She's being manipulated and taken advantage of. My sister swears she can get the disability because her meds make her drowsy. I confronted her this weekend that she's taking meds that are not approved for the condition she has (which I also have) and that there are other meds she could take. However, she abuses meds and Mom's had trouble with her getting into Mom's meds if the doc prescribes anything like xanax. She also questioned me VERY closely about symptoms when I was dx'd and then went around to doctors until she found one willing to dx her with it.
I'm just so frustrated. I want to protect my Mom but my sister is with her every night reversing anything I've accomplished with Mom.