iVillage Member
Registered: 05-28-2003
Wed, 08-06-2003 - 1:47pm
Hi - I have never been here before, but I need help...!!...Well..about a year ago, I moved in with my friend, her boyfriend and their daughter....I payed rent only and they covered the bills since it was just me in one room and I didn't take up anything but that room since I was hardly there...well we recently moved into a bigger house, and here comes the friend and her boyfriend have one room, their daughter has they are moving one of their friends into a room downstairs and she has a baby....and when they get the recreation room downstairs cleaned out, my friends boyfriend is making that his "guy room" I have one little room all to myself...and they want to split everything 4 ways this fair????...I spend all the time I have home basically in my room to avoid the baby gates and mess...I do not even have a tv in my room and I share a bathroom with their I wrong to ask for a break?
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2003
Wed, 08-06-2003 - 3:42pm
I have been there, although it was a long time ago.

It seems to me that these other people are taking advantage of you. That is ridiculous in my opinion - asking you to share the cost 4 ways when there are 3 of them and only one of you.

For myself I wouldn't have been happy in that situation. When I was single there was no way I would want to live around toys and baby gates and all that stuff.

Can't you find a way out? What I did was I moved back home with my parents first and then I found a place on my own. I thought this was a more diplomatic way of doing it rather than saying that my room mate was driving me nuts!!

If you can't move back home, perhaps you could say that you wanted more space and so you have found a place of your own. If you really have to stay where you are, I cannot think of a way you can avoid paying too much for your place without having a fight with your friend and you probably want to avoid that.

Avatar for cl_2and1more
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Wed, 08-06-2003 - 6:28pm
okay, we have talked about situations like this on the board before. I understand that it is easy to see that the situation is unfair. But you need a solution. You need to decide what you want and write it down.

You will be paying for room and board. Included is one private room (list the size), two meals a day, a shared bathroom with a (?) year old, access to shared kitchen area and living room. Duties and responsiblities: Cleaning room, cleaning the shared bathroom, taking trash from room and bath to garbage cans, Cooking dinner once a week. For this I am willing to pay (?) per month paid on the 1st day of each month.

This is just a sample of ideas. Make up your own that applies to you. And let them accept or refuse your offer. It they refuse, then ask that they write up what they consider fair. If you can not come up with a compromise, then you need to lay out all the bills of the house and fine out a total monthly cost. Then use the government way - divide the house into square feet and pay for your footage and a shared amount for shared square footage. If nothing else it may help them see how unfair they are being.

Let us know how it works out for you.


iVillage Member
Registered: 06-02-2003
Thu, 08-07-2003 - 9:08am
I don't mean to sound cruel or anything but in my opinion that mess and baby gates etc. is just part of it, when u live w/ ppl who have kids/babies. (One reason I wouldn't be roommates w/ my friend who has a small child) It sounds like u got a good deal when they lived in their smaller house and now they expect u to pay more yet u r less comfortable w/ the house setup and living arrangements. Personally I would move. If u feel what they expect u to pay is unfair, the only ppl u can get any action from is them, its not like a regulated renting system or anything, I mean they can pretty much say "you owe us $5,000 per month for 1 room" and if there's no contract or lease etc, then u have to pay or move, pretty much. If it at all possible I would leave and find a small apt, at least u would have peace & quiet and full run of the place! No offense to ur friends but I think its a little unusual (at least where I live) for a family who owns a nice big house to be renting out rooms to ppl right and left. I cant help but wonder what the neighbors and extended family think. Not that it really matters of course :-) Good luck! Rhiannon
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2003
Thu, 08-07-2003 - 12:20pm
Melissa's answer was really good. The only thing I personally would want to factor into the price would be what the last poster mentioned - things like baby stuff all over the place etc. etc. and its pretty hard to put a dollar figure on things like that.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2003
Fri, 08-08-2003 - 10:58pm
I agree...this isn't fair. Did you consider moving?