Selfish, Irresponsible Brother Always in Need!
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|Thu, 01-24-2013 - 8:53pm|
I just wanted to know everyone else's opinion. Part of me feels like "F my brother" ... I guess I'm more stressed and angry because I wish I absolutely didn't give a care.
My brother has ALWAYS had problems managing his money. He's always borrowing (more like begging since he never repays it) money from our mother, grandmother. Not only couldn't he manage his money, but neither could his wife! She doesn't wanna work. She wants a man to support her. They lost their apartments twice within a two year period. A year ago his wife decided she was sick of him and told him she wanted a divorce and that she wanted him gone within a week. We were both living in two different states at the time. I told him he was welcome to live with me until he got on his feet. He stayed with our aunt the first 3 months (rent free). He started a new job working full-time as soon as he moved here. He didn't have to pay rent, bus fare to and from work, food--NOTHING! And he never offered to either. He ended up quiting the job he already had to get another job that paid a $2 more. Only the job was 20 miles away and no bus went that far out! He was fully aware of that. My sister ended up having to drive 80miles/day just to bring him to and from work cause neither one of us wanted him to be jobless. He lost that job a month later!... But luckily he got another one three weeks later.
He expected EVERYTHING to be free! He wouldn't help with groceries, even though he ate all the food I bought. When I brought it to his attention that he was being selfish and unappreciative and that he could at least help with food if nothing else. He agreed and said he'd help out. Only he never did! He had been living with me for free for 6 months and it was at that point that I told him he'd have to pay to live here and that he should've had at least $4,000 saved by now.. He threw a HUGE fit about it! Saying he barely had money. So I'm like, "WHAT!? How the hell could you be broke when you've been making more money than me and with no expenses!?"... He gave ALLLL the money he was making to his ex-wife to help with her bills (even though she had got on section 8 paying $50 in rent), her dad's bills, her court fees, toiletries etc etc. Talk about slap in the face. I told him he had to pay SOMETHING if he wanted to continue live with me. There was no guilt or appreciation on his part. It was as if he thought I obligated to do for him. When I asked if he'd have done the same for me his response was, "it's different when you married. It's not like you got a man living here."... I told him I wanted him out by the next month (November), no excuses. As usual he had a bunch of excuses about how he owed his son a good christmas, and a furnished house. And I'm just thinking, "and that's MY responsibility to help you provide those things?" I work to provide for myself, not to help provide for him and his family! Now, I'm JUST beginning to celebrate him getting his own place. Only he manages to need something from me once again!
As soon as his sorry a** ex-wife finds out he got his own place. She comes up with this fabricated lie about how the son has to come live with him because section 8 people (or whoever) told her since she's working she can no longer live in those apartments and had a month to leave. And so she needs him to stay with him until she finds another apartment. Oh, and that's gonna take approxtimately 6-7 months to do. Mind you he doesn't even have a mattress for him or his son to even lay on sense he gave her all his money. So now he needs me to babysit! Now, I don't have any kids. So I'm used to having a peaceful house and not being bothered by an annoying kid. But sense he's family, I cant refuse. He sleeps over practically ever night so he can go to work. And then he tries to figure out all my off days so he can bring him over while he goes to this other job. The thing is, he doesn't even appreciate the fact that I'm babysitting his son! I ask him for a ride to work one time and he tells me, "awww man! I was about to go get a hair cut." There was another instance where he called me to tell me he was dropping his son off. So I'm like, "ok. I'm at the mall right now. Can you pick me up?" Now, I don't know anyone who's in need of a babysitter but cant even give the baby sitter a ride home, especially given the fact that he's interrupting MY TIME and I'm not even being compensated! Mind you the mall is literally a mile away from my house. This was his response, "Ughh.. You can't catch the bus?" I had to explain to him that a one minute drive can take 41 minutes on a bus. So I probably wasn't gonna be home by the time he dropped him off. I started to say, "fine! Watch your own dam son then!" I shouldn't have to explain anything to him... And then there was another time I asked him to pick me up from work late at night. He got all upset talking about I was gonna be breaking his rest and asked if my sister could give me a ride instead. My sister came and got me. And he brought his son over an hour later.
I'm just sick of him and so is everyone else! I don't even answer his calls anymore. Cause I know he's most likely calling to ask me for a favor. What would you do in my situation?