Should I be angry with my Friend - with family member that has molested his daughter

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2011
Should I be angry with my Friend - with family member that has molested his daughter
6
Mon, 02-14-2011 - 3:57pm

My friend had a party at her house over the holidays.

Avatar for elc11
Community Leader
Registered: 06-16-1998

I'm unclear about a few things here. You friend's brother molested his own daughter but is still living as a family with his wife and the molested daughter? The molestation occurred several years ago but you just found out about it after the party?

How did you find out about it? Were there criminal charges filed against the brother? Why did your friend decide to resume contact with her brother now?

Please clarify.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2011
Yes he is still living with his family. No charges ever brought against him. I only found out about it after the party by other friends. I was totally shocked. I don't know why they have reconnected. They just reconnected in 2010.

I have known these friends for a very long time, . These are friends that have shared in our wedding, birth of our daughter, etc.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-24-2004

This is a very sticky situation. Especially for your friend. If her brother was not convicted of any crime, your friend is probably treating him like he's innocent. Perhaps you should see how your friend is feeling about this issue (she could be in denial). If she is in denial, she will most likely not warn off other people with children, because she herself doesn't believe it.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-29-2002

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2003

It sounds like they don't believe it.

Avatar for elc11
Community Leader
Registered: 06-16-1998

Like others said, I would talk to your friend to hear her version of the story. If she believes that her brother is innocent then you ought to forgive her.