My sister is due in October.
When/If you receive a birth announcement or phone call of the birth, send a congratulations card to her. That is all that you need to do.
Well I'm sorry to hear that you aren't close to your sister. I don't now what that's like since I'm really close with my sibling. I feel like you have given the olive branch to her and she probably is so self-involved she doesn't realise the damage that's being caused. But if she's said things like she doesn't want you in her life... I would want to back away from her as well. I'm guessin she contacted you about the news. So you can send a message back saying you are happy for her. I wouldn't necessarily send a gift right away. It's one thing if she invites you to visit or for a baby shower but I wouldn't send anything at the moment. Wait until the child is born. Then send a small card & gift. I mean family can get annoying but you know if you don't send a gift & a card she'll use it against you for life saying you never acknowledged the child. Hopefully the child & being a mother will soften her? I'm assumin it is her first kid.
>>>I wouldn't be able to help myself, I don't think.
Oh I totally understand.
Hmmmm...it seems my prevous message didn't make it through cyberspace!
What I said was I find it interesting how the pendulum goes back and forth from generation to generation.
>>I would probably be overly involved (if I had more than one child) because of how my parents handled things.
If you're invited to a baby shower, I'd send a gift to your sister.
I have not been invited as of yet to attend a baby shower for my sister.
Are you already invited to a baby shower? Who will host it? Any way, I would give a gift for the baby, either in a baby shower or send it to her place with your mom. That won´t change your relationship with her, but you can continue trying to have a detached,