Swimercise update

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-01-2013
Swimercise update
4
Mon, 07-01-2013 - 5:30pm

Hello everyone!  I haven't been able to sign on with any of my old user ID's so I finally was able to register again with this one.

The last time I posted my sister had been diagnosed with lung/brain cancer.  On New Years Eve she was rushed to the hospital and placed on life support with pulmonary embolisms.  She survived and was transferred to rehab where she stayed for 30 days until she became unresponsive.  They found she had sepsis, brain bleed and swelling.  They sent her home in early March and began to get stronger.  On Easter Sunday she was sitting in a wheelchair talking and even helped with the potato salad. (she was proud of that).  It wasn't a few short days later that she began unresponsive again and continued to decline until she passed away on April 24th.  My sister died.  Still so hard to believe.  She was the hub of this family and her husband of 35 years is just devsastated.

You can go back and search my previous posts regarding my sister and my Mom.  My sister was hard to get a long with and I was finally rebelling against it.  The time since she was diagnosed to the day she died we were able to sort through all the feelings and know that regardless of the butting of heads we truly and intensely loved each other.  How do I continue to give advice when I was so sure I had it figured out.  Separate yourself from toxic people.....but at what price?  I do not have any regrets in regards to my history with my sister.  As we go through the process of memorials and I can see her through other's eyes I realize my sister had many valuable traits and was amazingly kind.  Just not to me....normal sister behavior?  Or could she feel free to be herself to me??  We had a benefit for her a week ago and 250 people showed up.  Dang....the love in the room was so thick you could cut it with a knife.  I was proud to be her sister....so we didn't like each other....not the end of the world.  Did we waste time?  No...I had my sweet and kind sister for a few months and was able to hold her hand and tell her many times that I love her.  She died knowing that...and I knew it in return.

I miss her crazy and I hurt for me and her sweet husband and 3 grown children.  My heart aches for so many things she is going to miss out on....since one of our nieces (my brother's daughter) has announced she's pregnant again after having a baby April 2012 who my sister doted on like her own Granddaughter.  That breaks my heart that that little girl will never know how much her Auntie loved her.

Sandy

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-01-2013
Wed, 07-10-2013 - 3:27pm

Thank you for the kind words and thoughts/prayers.

Sandy

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2003
Wed, 07-03-2013 - 8:38pm

Sandy I am so sorry for your loss of your sister.  Big Hugs and my prayers go out to you.  I am a strong believer in life after death and believe our loved ones that have crossed over do communicate with us with little things in life such as a song coming on just at the moment you were thinking of them, to their favorite bird visiting your window sill as you stare out of the window thinking of them.  I strongly believe that both of my parents have communicated that they are never gone in spirit and are with me as I walk through life without them in body.  It's a comforting thought.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2004
Wed, 07-03-2013 - 12:34am

Same thing happened to me!  I couldn't get back on the board for several months, then suddenly I'm able to get back on!

I do remember your sister issues and your heart break over it.  She had just come home from the hospital and was improving when I last was on the forum.  I'm so sorry you lost her, but so glad you two were able to find each other again...and that you were able to see her through the eyes of her friends.  Sometimes it's impossible to understand why family members have issues with each other, but in the end it isn't REALLY about why...it's about finding the love again.  I'm glad you were able to do that!  You're in my thoughts and prayers.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2010
Mon, 07-01-2013 - 5:51pm

 I have followed some of your posts in the past.  I am SO sorry for your loss, but am happy to hear that at least you and your sister reconciled before it was too late.  You can now live your life knowing that deep down, she did love you and you her and that's what is most important. 

Hugs to you, Sandy.