What to do... what to do.....

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2011
What to do... what to do.....
45
Sun, 03-06-2011 - 8:09pm

First, I'll give you some background. I'm a 26 year old guy. I have a brother who's 28 and we were like best friends. We even look so much alike, people think we're twins and we have to correct them. Two years ago, I moved across the country for a job. He stayed in my home town.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2004
Sun, 03-06-2011 - 11:40pm

I think you're being dishonest.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2011
Mon, 03-07-2011 - 12:03am

Dishonest? How? My brother and I are "all that close". I tried to just plain TALK to him. When I'm being honest about her, he shuts down. I learned something from other experiences. You can't stop someone from marrying who they're going to marry. Aren't you the same lady who's daughter was married to the abusive coke head? Well how successful were you in "talking" her out of that relationship?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2004
Mon, 03-07-2011 - 12:24am

>>>When I'm being honest about her, he shuts down.

Which ought to be a clue that he's made a decision.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2011
Mon, 03-07-2011 - 12:37am

My answers in red

>>>>Which ought to be a clue that he's made a decision.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2008
Mon, 03-07-2011 - 12:50am

Hey! Shadowsfall. Great to see another guy here. I thought I was the one and only! Ha Ha! Don't let all these ladies scare you off!

I think you're doing the right thing. You talked to your brother and now you're backing off, right? That's probably what you should do.

I don't see anything wrong with having a bachelor party. Guys have come to expect bachellor parties, the same way girls expect bridal showers and their bachlorette parties.

I know you're worried about him, but maybe he'll wake up and smell the coffee. If he does, just encourage him. He'll probably feel beat up already and not in the mood for heaing "I told you so".

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2011
Mon, 03-07-2011 - 1:19am

Hey! Shadowsfall. Great to see another guy here. I thought I was the one and only! Ha Ha! Don't let all these ladies scare you off!

I won't. LOL!

I think you're doing the right thing. You talked to your brother and now you're backing off, right? That's probably what you should do.

Right. That how it went down. Last Christmas when they fought like hell, I was with them a lot. She got pissed that he spent two hours picking up people at the airport in a snowstorm. The airport is 50 miles away and the snow was coming down in droves. She kept pulling him away, by wanting to take long walks or wanting him to go to the mall with her.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2008
Mon, 03-07-2011 - 1:40am

She sounds like a self centered biotch. Your brother's got to know she's not playing with a full deck. Well, you said your piece. As long as you're "business as usual" with him, he knows you'll be around if he needs you.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2009
Mon, 03-07-2011 - 4:21am
<< I'm going to throw the bachelor party. Too many people will be disappointed if I don't. >>

Are these people more important than your brother, the groom? Are you planning on surprising him with your party? Have you asked him whether he wants one?

I find your approach a little juvenile.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2008
Mon, 03-07-2011 - 7:52am
I say throw him the bachelor party!!! WTf!!!! She's got no intention of really leaving him at the altar. She just wants him to think she will..... but she won't!!! Yes, she may get pissy with you & maybe even him....but sounds like the poor guy will need a lil fun if he's going to be spending the rest of eternity with that stick in the mud!!!

A bachelor party is like a rite of passage & if you truly trust your better half....then there should really be no issue!!



My dh used to come home & tell me all (and yes, I do mean ALL) the gory details of all the bachelor parties that he used to go to....even his own!!! I even saw the photos!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-24-2004
Mon, 03-07-2011 - 12:23pm
helga1969 wrote:
She's got no intention of really leaving him at the altar. She just wants him to think she will..... but she won't!!!

That's what I was thinking. It's time to call her bluff. I agree the brother is going to need a little fun, before the wedding. If the brother was smart, he'd leave her at the altar.

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