Gifts you don't really want

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2011
Gifts you don't really want
Tue, 07-31-2012 - 8:37pm

I hate electronic gadgets, but my husband will buy one for me when my birthday comes up.  I am not interested in it, of course, and he winds up using it for himself.  So its like he bought a gift for himself.

Anyone else have this problem  ?

Avatar for hugss
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2010
Tue, 07-31-2012 - 10:48pm
Hi & welcome to the group,
Perhaps you should remind him of this before birthdays.
Also since you don't like them .. Least someone is using it.
Discuss what kinds of gifts you would appreciate & him as well.
With my dh .. We don't do gifts really anymore.
Let us know how it goes if you get a chance to talk to him :smileyhappy:

Avatar for mrosie
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-23-2000
Wed, 08-01-2012 - 9:54am

DH has done the same thing for me! LOL I got an iPod when they were brand new, a first generation Kindle...I have pointed out to DH that he's allowed to buy gadgets for himself rather than disquise them as gifts to me. :smileywink:

My observation has been that DH responds much better to specific lists of items I want. Hints don't work. Clues are useless. :smileywink:

For some occasions, especially our anniversary, we've taken to planning experiences together. Going to a special exhibit at the museum or to a concert we'll both enjoy. We have the memories of something fun we did together and it gives us pause to focus on our time together.


iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2010
Wed, 08-01-2012 - 1:36pm

I don't have that problem probably because at our ages (50 & 52), dh and I are at that age where we have everything we want or need.  We're both very low-maintence type people, so don't want for much.  He likes tools, but has every tool known to man and I'm not into purses, perfume, jewelry or anything like that, so don't need anything.  Niether on of us are "techies", so aren't into IPads, Kindles...whatever.

Dh DID give me a nice card for my birthday and wrote in it "Good for one free spa day" as I had mentioned once how much I'd enjoy that.  Wellll.....I have yet to do it.  I hate spending money and with 2 kids still on the payroll (19 & 20) ...It was a nice idea though.

We did go away in May as an anniversary/birthdays celebration which suited us better than gifts. 

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2008
Wed, 08-01-2012 - 11:49pm

I've never had that problem with my DH. But he DOES like to spend way too much money on me. This year things are really tight bc he is changing careers and starting off pt. But then he goes and buys me diamond earrings for my bday (we got each other nothing for xmas so I think he felt guilty about not providing). At the beginning of our r/ship, he was very frugal so I think he's also trying to show me he has we used have disagreements about it bc I would say I value savings and saving money but there has to be a balance and you have to live too :smileyhappy:



iVillage Member
Registered: 05-15-2009
Fri, 08-03-2012 - 11:06am
I agree. I have a wish list on my computer where I note things that would be nice to have. I started doing this a few years ago because when people would ask me, I could never think of a single thing that I wanted. Unless you tell your DH what you'd like, he probably won't figure it out on his own.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-16-2004
Sun, 08-05-2012 - 3:00pm

I used to have that with my ex husband  but  my current husband that never happens. My dear husband buys things to me that normal people would think is crappy gifts  like a spoon, smoked pepper and he is pondering to get me a meatslicer for christmas  ( he asked me which kind I wanted).

What you should do is sit down and talk to your husband about this and if you still get something he will use, give he a proper girly spaset for his birthday.

Oh when it comes to list, in my bookmarks there is  I Want list , which includes lots of things I found I want and my husband goes through it when he cleans my computer.