It's not the monogamy that gets you, it's the monotony

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Registered: 04-08-2008
It's not the monogamy that gets you, it's the monotony
7
Sun, 03-25-2012 - 11:03pm

This is a quote from DH yesterday. I didn't have this Friday off so we had a marathon day of shopping/cooking/cleaning/park/etc. He was DONE with kids by the end of the day and bedtime could not come soon enough. He said he could see how some men struggle with marriage. That raising a family can be "monotonous"...then that quote came out. He then said that it's an illusion that being single isn't...that even single men get bored with life and bogged down by the "rat race" of working, etc. He said having a family to share it all with makes it more meaningful and enriched.

What about you? DO you think married life can be monotonous?

Please share your thoughts :)

Dee

Avatar for hugss
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2010
passion8te wrote:

This is a quote from DH yesterday. I didn't have this Friday off so we had a marathon day of shopping/cooking/cleaning/park/etc. He was DONE with kids by the end of the day and bedtime could not come soon enough. He said he could see how some men struggle with marriage. That raising a family can be "monotonous"...then that quote came out. He then said that it's an illusion that being single isn't...that even single men get bored with life and bogged down by the "rat race" of working, etc. He said having a family to share it all with makes it more meaningful and enriched.

What about you? DO you think married life can be monotonous?

Please share your thoughts :)

Dee




Avatar for msally99
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003

I think adult life of all kinds can be monotonous, simply because we do the same things each week. DH and I don't have kids in our home, but our life is still much the same from week to week. I agree 100% with what Hugs said: it's up to us to make sure life is not monotonous (in a bad way).

Avatar for mrosie
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-23-2000

I agree with both Carol and hugss. Adult life comes with certain responsibilities that crop up week after week, month after month, whether you have kids or not, pets or not, work or not, etc. Meals have to be cooked, laundry has to be done, the house has to be cleaned.

But there's nothing saying that you can't make even those repetitive things more interesting. Each individual and couple has the ability to either spice up the mundane chores or mix in some more interesting activities to keep things interesting.

Unfortunately, I think a lot of people fall into the trap of believing TV and movies as reality. When is the last time you saw someone on TV vacuuming or cleaning their toilet? LOL

RoseAnn

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2008

My DH is not creative when it comes to spicing up life. In fact, he has a perfect pitch ear for music but plays no instruments and doesn't sing often (only for me when I ask him to bc he's very good and I find it romantic). He can draw and etch with charcoal...I bought a fabulous set once and he's drawn once picture...etc...etc. I think he's just monotonous, LOL. He ate cereal for breakfast EVERY DAY before he met me! He said it was quick and easy so why not?

No wonder he needs me :)

Dee

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-16-2004

We have this idea

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2008
Thanks for the insight, I think that is a very healthy view on life :)

Dee
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2004

hello!! well, i think hes partially right. anything can be a struggle if its monotonus-work, school, even religion...if youre doing the same things over and over-yeah it gets tedious. routines are comfortable but they can get boring too. i think you have to spice things up somewhere-my dh and i go play cards once a month every month. thats a lil adult time and we get around different people and its something we share together. we both work a lot so were not together all the time, every day. we have a pretty healthy sex life and we try new things to spice things up in there too. the key is to not get bored-to try new things and to communicate if you are bored...i dont think life can be a thrill a minute, but you have to do things to try and spice it up if you feel that monotany. and what your dh said about the single guys feeling it too-i can understand how that would get tedious too. to hear my bro-in-law talk about life before he married my sister-it sounds very dull. he had a 4 bedroom house and spent very little time anywhere but in his bedroom and the bathroom. the rest of the time he was at work. he had a dog and he had friends but really all his life was was work and sleep...occasionally on saturday, he would go work on cars with his buddy. that was it. i married pretty early in life-i never experienced the "single" life-neither did my sister-but he did...this is my take...im interested to read others too:)
JOANNE