Joint accounts or separate

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-03-2005
Joint accounts or separate
1
Sun, 04-29-2012 - 10:02am

I was wondering if there is anyone out there who has gone from single accounts to joint. Was it an easy transition? What advice can you give? Was anyone against it and how was that handled?

My husband and I are saving for a new house and right now have our finances separate. I would like to combine our accounts because as I see it we are building a life together, the money becomes our money and the debts become our debts. In the next few months all of my outstanding debts will be paid off. My husbands are a little longer. I suggested that we start taking things on together because perhaps we can get things paid down quicker and getting us into a house sooner. I don't understand why everything is kept separate. His response was he doesn't see how it could be different or what else we could do differently by combining the finances. We both make the same amount of money him maybe a little more by only a few thousands.

My parents have always had their finances together. They have tackled every financial issue together. My mom has a savings account for herself where she puts some aside for emergencies or a rainy day. (It’s usually spent on both of them, the house or the entire family.) My dad has always been encouraged to set up an account of his own for a little bit of savings but he has never bothered. Whereas my husband's parents kept their finances separate and are now divorced (again). Every issue or argument was about money. His mom accused his dad of hiding money. His mom used to do the same only she spent hers on vacations that she wouldn't tell her husband about until leaving for the airport. (And he was not welcome to go with her.) Still after their divorce his mom still goes on about the money and what his dad has or does with it. (She does have other issues, obviously) I can understand that my husband knows married life as having separate finances but his example didn't work out. And I hate to point that out on him because his parents' divorce is sometimes a sore spot. But how can that even been a valid argument as to why things should be separate.

I am not saying we don't have each our are own little separate savings for a rainy day. I just think what happens when we own a house or having kids. Who becomes responsible for what? We are a joint effort in every other way why not this?

Avatar for hugss
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2010
Sun, 04-29-2012 - 12:33pm

Hi kheta,
Welcome to the group :smileyhappy:

I have been married for almost 33 years now.
Since the very beginning of time we have had joint accounts.
As you say I do have my own private *stash* but of course DH knows all about it, LOL
I agree with you & your thinking with combining.
It may help speed things along with getting some things paid off sooner.
It is suppose to be an *our* thing instead of a *yours/mine*
Will be interesting to see what others say so do check back :smileyhappy: