A little WWYD (family related)

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Registered: 09-06-2007
A little WWYD (family related)
9
Mon, 11-21-2011 - 1:27pm

I have two sisters (ages 32, 34 - I'm 35 by the way) and they are BOTH pregnant and due in March.

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Registered: 09-25-2010
Mon, 11-21-2011 - 4:57pm
sienna76 wrote:

I have two sisters (ages 32, 34 - I'm 35 by the way) and they are BOTH pregnant and due in March.




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Registered: 03-23-2000
Mon, 11-21-2011 - 5:57pm

I think the length of unemployment benefits varies state by state. When I got unemployment from OR, I was only eligible for 6 months but that was 10+ years ago and I know with the sagging economy, many states are extending benefits.

In some ways this sounds like the perfect arrangement. However, there are also a lot of possible problems. Is your unemployed sister married? How does her DH feel about this possible arrangement? Was there any discussion about her being a SAHM prior to this offer to nanny for her niece or nephew?

Some reservations I would have about this: having one's own newborn plus someone elses would be really difficult! Almost like having twins. There could be issues if the nanny sister isn't doing things the way the other sister wants or vice verse.

If they are already disagreeing on how to handle payment legally, I would be concerned that other issues would crop up and could damage the relationship long-term.

Ultimately, it is their decision and I would encourage you

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2007
Mon, 11-21-2011 - 6:45pm
I think younger sister is going to look elsewhere for day care because she doesn't want to pay sister nanny under the table. But so many places have a huge waiting list (this is downtown Chicago) that she might be kind of SOL for a while and need sister nanny.

The unemployed sister is unmarried and lives with her boyfriend. They have a 5 year old son as well. I think her BF is fine with the arrangement for the short term, but would love her to make the kind of salary a health law professional could make.

Yes, they have very different ideas on how to do stuff - so I see a potential issue there too!

My mom wanted to be the nanny for both babies, but she was not asked. She is so baby hungry! LOL But she's 60 years old, lives 50 miles away and my dad is dying of cancer. Besides the fact that she's crazier than a bag of cats, it's all around a bad idea for grandma to be the full-time nanny under these circumstances, yet she is so incredibly hurt and depressed they want her to do this.

I just watch this all from 1500 miles away!
Avatar for mrosie
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Registered: 03-23-2000
Mon, 11-21-2011 - 10:40pm

Maybe she could offer to be the back-up in case the primary childcare falls through? It certainly doesn't sound like she's in a situation where she could take it on full-time but she could take on once in awhile potentially.

I am totally using that phrase! Lord knows I can think of enough situations it describes. LOL


I just watch this all from 1500 miles away!

Sometimes that distance is the best thing for everyone involved!

I hope they get it sorted out. At least they have a few months to figure out their options.

RoseAnn

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Registered: 09-06-2007
Tue, 11-22-2011 - 2:39pm

I am totally using that phrase! Lord knows I can think of enough situations it describes. LOL

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Registered: 04-08-2008
Thu, 11-24-2011 - 12:16am

The problem with this arrangement would be that your middle sister could be jeopardizing her future career. She just spent a lot of money to finish a degree and the longer she stays out of work, the harder it will be to get her foothold. It will be hard to find work while pregnant. But the baby will be born and she can start really looking for everything and

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Registered: 09-06-2007
Thu, 11-24-2011 - 7:31pm

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Registered: 01-07-2008
Wed, 11-30-2011 - 4:59pm

Tough one.

p
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Registered: 09-06-2007
Sat, 12-03-2011 - 10:20pm
Yesterday they were both at one of their homes, and we were Skyping all 3 of us. I had them show me their pregnant bellies! It was pretty funny because they were making their bellies touch on the webcam.

Younger sister decided to look for day care instead. The other sister is not THAT close and it would be hard for her to travel so much and then pick up her 5 year old from school at 2:30 then go back up north to sister's house. Nanny sister kind of really wanted to stay home, but no one is hurt thankfully!