Blended families, it ain't easy, but (m)
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|Sun, 04-13-2003 - 4:05pm|
Here's a few key points. For the full article click on the above link.
Incidentally, here are a few guidelines that will help you negotiate an enthusiastic agreement:
1. Set ground rules to make negotiations pleasant and safe: a) try to be pleasant and cheerful through your discussion of the issue, b) put safety first--do not threaten to cause pain or suffering when you negotiate, even if your spouse makes threatening remarks or if the negotiations fail, c) if you reach an impasse, stop for a while and come back to the issue later.
2. Identify the problem from the perspectives of both you and your husband. Be able to state the other spouse's position before you go on to find a solution.
3. Brainstorm solutions with abandon. Spend some time thinking of all sorts of ways to handle the problem, and don't correct each other when you hear of a plan that you don't like. You'll have a chance to do that later.
4. Choose the solution that is appealing to both of you. And if your brainstorming has not given you an answer that you can enthusiastically agree upon, go back to brainstorming.