Frustrated with Picky Eater and Bad Study Habits
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|Wed, 10-06-2010 - 6:56pm|
Frustrated here...... I have a few issues. 1) a Picky Eater DS11, 2) DD7 is having trouble completing work in school, and 3) DF is losing his patience with all of them.
1 - My son has been a picky eater since he was a baby. I saw a doctor when he was 3 who said he'd grow out of it. The child has not. Clearly my son has issues with certain textured food, smells, etc. I let him get by with only eating the things he liked .... hoping he'd grow out of it and like more things. Then, enter DF, who feels that a child should eat what's on his plate. DF has done an amazing job getting him to try many different things. But DS11 still does not like them. DS11 will sit at the table eating very slowly for about 3 hours. DF has taken away his Wii and Computer time. Makes him eat the same thing for breakfast, afterschool snack, dinner again... etc. In the meantime, I think DS11 hates him for it. DF and I disagree with how extreme to be when it comes to eating his food. DF has sometimes said, "if he hasn't eaten all his food, then i won't let him go to sleep until he finishes." I drew the line on that form of punishment... I told DF that i won't agree to spanking for not eating, keeping him awake for not eating, and i'm not comfortable with making him eat the same thing for breakfast. I agree to make DS11 "try" a bunch of different foods but what to do after that and the child still doesn't like it?? I don't know. I'm frustrated. And when DF tells me how things are going at night when i'm not there... he sounds frustrated too. We do plan to have my son see a therapyst. I'm suspecting some form of sensory disorder or something. It just doesn't make sense. :(
2) Next issue is my DS7 who is now struggling with school work. Perhaps she is ADD. DF called me tonight frustrated that she sat and worked on her homework for 3 hours and only wrote 9 words. I really don't know how to help her... and it frustrates me that i can't really do anything. And can't do anything from work when DF calls me in frustration. He says, "i'm about to flip my lid."
3) so issue #3 is that these things get between our relationship. I feel like he's mad at me because they are my children. And I've raised them so far to have these "bad habits", if you will...
4) and not to mention DS11 also has a learning disability (deslexia). He takes forever to do his homework and is constantly forgetting his things at school. DS11 is a sweet child. It hurts me to see him so sad. It made me sad this morning when he had to eat his dinner for breakfast and almost missed the bus. DF shoved the food in his mouth. the sight of it almost made me gag.... And i couldn't let DS11 go to school with food dripping out of his mouth so i told him to spit it out and hurry up to catch the bus.
Maybe, DF is doing all the right things to help the children succeed. But i feel like I am their mother. I should be able to make some choices too. Like this morning I made DS11 a peanut butter sandwhich for breakfast. DF got up and snatched it out of his hands. threw it away. and said, "no you are eating your unfinished dinner."
I'm not sure anyone can really help (beside a professional at this point)... but i needed to vent. i'm getting scared that these troubles will ruin the relationship. DF has said he won't ever leave me. that we will get through all this... But i'm beginning to feel more and more horrible.
thanks for letting me share.