Furniture and the ex!

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2008
Furniture and the ex!
8
Thu, 08-18-2011 - 12:13pm

Hi Everyone.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Thu, 08-18-2011 - 12:26pm

My very short answer is do not get involved--it's not your business.

Community Leader
Registered: 08-25-2006
Thu, 08-18-2011 - 2:28pm

Hello High!

Yea, although I agree it is pretty crummy of her to ask for furniture 2 years later especially after leaving the M with most of the assets and no debt, you really have to stay out of it.

Serenity
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-07-2008
Thu, 08-18-2011 - 3:14pm

I am in agreement with the others...

Lately, I've really been trying to examine the "it bothers me button", but doesn't bother SO...Often, if it is something that just bothers me then I try to really look at it and see if it's "worthy" to do anything about, usually it isn't...lol and then I just try to turn off my feelings about it (harder said than done-at times)...In this situation ultimately the choice is his about the furniture...Maybe if he does decide to "sell" it to her or for a small amount you guys could spend the money on a dinner out or something like that...

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2007
Sat, 08-20-2011 - 10:56pm

Itshightime, you could try looking for the silver lining in this:

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2008
Mon, 08-22-2011 - 6:27pm

There is truth there -- it would be nice to have all of that stuff out of the basement.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2002
Mon, 08-22-2011 - 9:11pm
Hi Hightime--

I've been offline a bit, and missed the party here----looks like you've made your decision.

I think what's most unnerving re: situations like this,.....is seeing your SO simply *accept* the role of doormat---------yeah, drain "our" bank account, leave me with the (not high quality) furniture----then later expect me to give it to you, as though I've simply been *storing* it for you all of this time-----

Definitely his decision, but if it were me.....I would definitely want to reinforce reality that he doesnt "owe" her anything-----(hah, will he have to DELIVER it to her place as well? Let's hope not....)

BEST WISHES1
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2008
Wed, 08-24-2011 - 6:16pm

To tell you the truth, I had made up my mind to just stay out of it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2002
Thu, 08-25-2011 - 8:41am
Quote:
"He is a really loving guy, and he is very generous and loving with me, and I am really very fortunate to have such a wonderful man in my life. But until he stands up to her, he is vulnerable to her, and as long as he's vulnerable that way, he's can't be there 100% for me."---

Yes, I understand completely.