How to make this work

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-31-2011
How to make this work
10
Wed, 02-02-2011 - 9:34am

I have been dating a widower like myself for about a year, and he wants to get married. My husband died about 9 years ago and I have not dated for about 5 years until the meeting of my present friend. His wife passed about 2 years ago. I have a 14 year old and his children are grown, but everyday he keeps his great grandkids after school because his wife use to do the same.

Community Leader
Registered: 08-25-2006
Fri, 02-04-2011 - 1:39pm
Great post Mark! Your words are always wise. I have a clingy DD11 that because of the age gap in my kids is essentially an only child. My SO would be able to totally relate to you.

Sounds like you have a great R with your GF. I hope you continue to pop in here and offer your wisdom.
Serenity
Avatar for mhash
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 02-04-2011 - 1:23pm

I am in my late 50s and have been dating a widow in her early 50s.

Community Leader
Registered: 08-25-2006
Thu, 02-03-2011 - 6:19pm

Welcome to the board, Karen.

Serenity
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-31-2011
Thu, 02-03-2011 - 1:15pm

just have to reconsider a few things, but i didn't think of how she would look at him as a grandfather,

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-31-2011
Thu, 02-03-2011 - 1:11pm

he had never been alone until the death of his wife, and it has been two years, i tried to get him interested in other things, and i really do need to evaluate the ME time issue ,

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-31-2011
Thu, 02-03-2011 - 1:08pm

if feels so good to hear another outlook on the situation

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Wed, 02-02-2011 - 7:08pm

I am kind of feeling the opposite of mrsdecember on the chld issue.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2007
Wed, 02-02-2011 - 1:03pm

And don't forget the whole extrover/introvert theory of sucking the life out of people, or having the life sucked out of you.

Pamela


The choices we make in thought word and deed inevitably return to us in kind.


iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2005
Wed, 02-02-2011 - 11:25am

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-20-2008
Wed, 02-02-2011 - 10:37am

Hi there,

Just my 2 cents here for what its worth, I am wondering do you have other interests and things to do or is it that you want more time with your 14yo?? If it is that you want more time with your 14yo, I would say simply she is going to be an adult VERY soon and moved out VERY soon and then you will be alone if not for your SO.