I told him my secret...now what about HIS?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2010
I told him my secret...now what about HIS?
13
Thu, 01-27-2011 - 3:33pm

I'm not sure if anyone remembers my original post where I was terrified of telling my DBF that I have a bottom denture.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Thu, 01-27-2011 - 3:56pm

I have heard of this arrangement before where the kids stay in one place & the parents go back & forth--it's unusual because in most cases, each parent has their own apt so how many people do you know who could afford that?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2010
Thu, 01-27-2011 - 4:21pm

Okay, no, I've heard this from one other person before and it DOES seem logical.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2010
Thu, 01-27-2011 - 4:31pm

I also probably have to say that this whole SERIOUS relationship leading to possible marriage when you have an ex and kids and they have an ex and kids is just REALLY much more complicated than I ever thought it would be.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-23-2009
Thu, 01-27-2011 - 5:35pm

I'm sure that you might over-hear him when he's speaking to her about the kids on the phone. If it's all about the kids and nothing more--then I'm sure you have nothing to worry about.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2002
Thu, 01-27-2011 - 9:44pm
Glad to hear about the first situation ---

Re: the house---------I'm not understanding---where is she living the days/nights he's with kids in "the" house?---and why cant kids live there with her, they rent the house, and he gets small apt?

REGARDLESS-----how old are kids, and do kids know/understand "divorce" has happened?

One concern might be that "the" move/house selling/dad no longer "living" with them there *coincides* with you/he marrying----------and the kids "blame" you for "loss" of dad-------------so I'd want to be sure they UNDERSTOOD the situation now..........
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2010
Fri, 01-28-2011 - 9:35am

As far as I know it is it in their divorce stuff that she not get the pension BUT the contingency was that she be allowed to live in the home until it sells and then she gets such and such amount when it does.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-03-2008
Fri, 01-28-2011 - 12:05pm

It sounds like they actually have a pretty civil relationship and that's good.




Community Leader
Registered: 08-25-2006
Fri, 01-28-2011 - 12:51pm

Well, as odd as it may seem, I have also heard of the kids staying in the house and the parents flip-flopping.

Serenity
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Fri, 01-28-2011 - 1:12pm

I think you are smart not to have him move right in w/ you--it will be an adjustment for the kids to have their parents living apart and they should get used to that first before a second adjustment of getting used to you & your kids.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2010
Fri, 01-28-2011 - 2:29pm

He told me he did tell his exW about me.

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