Not willing to give up
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|Sun, 06-06-2010 - 2:10am|
Tonight my wife told me that I was acting like I was young, childless, and without responsibility and that she wants us to take some time apart.
The thing is that my life is all responsibility. I do all that I have to do to provide for our family and care for our children. I'm no deadbeat dad. So if I want to go out once a month when my friends are around (who also all have families) after the kids go to bed, why shouldn't I have the right to?
I have been going out more recently and I never do so without first coming to her about it. I wouldn't go if she had a problem with it, and she hasn't seemed to until now. I stay out late and have no problem getting up with the kids in the morning so she can sleep.
We have had a long string of problems, more so lately. We have been through 2 long-term separations but always have fallen back in love with one another (if we were ever really out).
She is suggesting that she goes and takes a vacation to her old neighborhood to visit her friends for a week. She is choosing this over using the week of vacation for family time because she has just started a new job and doesn't get much vacation.
She doesn't have many friends here but the people that she wants to visit haven't been in communication with her in 20 years. She doesn't have many close friends at all come to think of it.
I meet a lot of people through my job that I can relate to and we have hit it off. I have tried to get her to be friends with their wives so that we can all do activities together (such as the vacation that we're supposed to go on next week) but she is very shy and has never seemed to warm up.
I'm not saying that I don't agree but I feel like she is doing it to get away from me which I don't think is right for us right now. I feel like we're growing apart.
Our wants and needs for our future together differ and there doesn't seem to be a middle ground. That frightens me but no matter how bad it gets, I have a lot of fight left in me. I don't want to give up. The concept of therapy freaks me out too so I'm not sure if that's an option. I just want to be able to work it out together.
Thoughts anyone? I don't know what I'm looking for, maybe if just to hear a mutual parties thoughts..