I finally lost it!!!
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|Wed, 05-23-2007 - 4:57pm|
I really need to vent here. The other day my exe’s wife called again to change the visitation schedule. My ex has his wife talk with me because he says he can’t stand to talk with me. Since she came into the picture my DH and I constantly have to change the visitation schedule to accommodate things that “come up” with her and my ex. We have changed the visitation schedule 7 times this year alone. I understand when things come up…an illness, a special engagement, a concert or sporting event on a certain night that can’t be changed- things that just can’t be planned on any other day but they use any excuse to schedule errands and things on their visitation nights AND they give last minute notices constantly causing my DH and I to have to cancel plans, not to mention what it does to the kids. One time it was well we have to get our paperwork ready for filing taxes. Ok and why can’t you do that on another night when you don’t have the kids or do it at the table while the kids play? Another was their daughter’s graduation they didn’t want my kids at. Another it was well I think I need the doc to look at my leg but didn’t want to go on Monday or Tuesday so I will go tonight and not have the kids. Yet another was her daughter’s birthday party they didn’t want my kids at so they said we can have them next weekend but not this weekend. They act like they are babysitters, not parents and my kids get in the way of their errands. I, like any parent take my kids with me because, well I have kids. I get my parents to baby-sit from time to time when needed but not for everyday things. I go to the bank usually on my lunch hour as well as go to the doc and dentist on my lunch hour. I schedule things like closing on a new house, have our accountant do our taxes, etc when their dad has visitation. Why can’t they do the same?
When the exe’s wife came into the picture and they would cancel a Saturday visitation because he had to work (she wouldn’t pick up the kids and have them all day) and I would say well why don’t you guys have them after work on Saturday and all day Sunday they would say well we have plans. Exe’s wife says the visitation schedule should be flexible and she doesn’t understand what the big deal is. She also tried to get my DH and I to change our visitation schedule to match the one she has with her ex so that her and my ex would have free weekends without kids. I’m sorry but this visitation schedule was set forth five years ago during our divorce and works well with not only our schedule but my DH’s visitation schedule with his children. DH’s ex and her new husband work out their visitation with his ex to coincide with ours so that’s 3 couple’s schedule that would have to change. Just because you marry a man who is divorced with children doesn’t give you the right to come in and demand a visitation schedule change to fit your visitation with your ex and your kids. Well I lost it on the phone and started a text war. Immature, yes but I lost it. I can’t stand talking with exe’s wife on the phone because she is rude, blunt, tactless, has an attitude and a chip on her shoulder and she talks down to me. She criticizes my kids all the time. I have tried and tried to be civil lest I be cast as the witch ex wife. In the meantime her and my ex have walked all over me and I just refuse to play the game anymore for the sake of peace. My DH got into it and told the exe’s wife not to call me, not to badmouth my kids (which she did the week before on the phone). Then my ex called him and they went at it. This is the last thing I wanted to happen but I’m tired of being lied to and being jerked around. How can I get these irrational changes in visitation to stop? How do I get my ex to stop having his wife discuss our children and instead have him grow up and discuss things with me?