New to Military Relationship

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2007
New to Military Relationship
Mon, 05-30-2011 - 2:25pm

Hi, I’m new to writing on this board and to a military Relationship. My Boyfriend is a Navy reserve, who will be deployed in ten months or so. When he deploys he will be in charge of the medical care for over 150 Marines. I'm so proud of him, serving his country and taking care of soldiers as well as civilians, but the most terrifying thing is that he will be in the most violent part of Afghanistan.

I'm completely clueless when it comes to military life, the only info I know about it is the stuff I see in TV shows and movies.  A month before he told me where he was going to be stationed, I watched a documentary about a unit that was stationed in the same area he will be in. It showed them constantly under fire and even the death of an American soldier.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2007
Mon, 05-30-2011 - 9:20pm

Welcome to the board!

I'm Melanie, the board's CL, and my husband is serving his third year-plus deployment. We lucked out and missed one rotation.

I definitely know what it's like to have a loved one in combat -- even in the thick of things. But what you eventually figure out is that worrying will not change anything. So you learn to stay busy, live your life, and cope with the feelings as they surface. You learn that a huge part of surviving deployment is learning to play the mental game. You learn to let yourself feel when you need to and pick yourself back up before it overpowers you, and in the end, you learn that you're stronger than you think.