Prudie counsels a military wife whose boss won't give her leave to see her soldier off to war

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-13-2006
Prudie counsels a military wife whose boss won't give her leave to see her soldier off to war
5
Tue, 01-25-2011 - 4:17pm

I was reading an column on slate.com (http://www.slate.com/id/2282261) About a military wife who's husband is set to deployfor a year. He's getting two weeks leave prior to deployment, which the plan on using to visit his family and take a vacation toFrance. The catch is, her employer is refusing to let her take the two week leave, at which point she's thinking about quitting tobe with her husband prior to his leaving.

I know a lot of us have BTDT, not trying to start a great debate but I was just wondering what your advice would be to thiswoman. (one comment said something about seeing if the husband could break his two week leave into 2 one week vacations, we all know how easy that is to do LOL)

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2007

I think it depends on how vital her job is to her family and how much she enjoys it.




iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2007

Oh, and I just read Prudie's reply. I do agree with her advice to make sure her boss understands the situation and, possibly, to speak to someone higher up in the company since the inquirer is obviously happy in her job. However, I think the advice to contact an employment attorney is a bit over the top. Unfortunately, vacations abroad to bond with a deploying husband aren't usually covered by law.




iVillage Member
Registered: 08-20-2005
hmmm, that's a toughie... I mean, when Tru deployed he was in Texas and I was in Georgia and we hadn't seen each other for nearly 2 months prior to him leaving (I went to Texas to visit beginning of February and he deployed end of March)... I couldn't find the article you were referring to, so do you know if she has tried to take less than the full 2 weeks and maybe only do the vacation or the visiting family instead of doing both? I don't know that I could justify quitting my job in this economy unless she's in a REALLY good field that she'd be able to easily find another job. And even then, it won't look good on her part because not all employers are going to be understanding about her reasoning...
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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-26-2008

I just read the column and some of the comments. It bothers me that Prudie advised the lawyer, as I think that is a bit of a strong response. If her employer can give her, say, one week (I'm assuming that is the 5 day work week), that is great and she should take it. I can understand the employer saying no to a vacation request. If two week vacations are not given as a "policy" of the company (not actually mentioned in the exchanges, but a valid reason for an employer to deny the request), I don't think the deployment of an employee's spouse should be treated as a special case. And no, I do not think that she should quit her job. I understand, completely, wanting that time together, but weren't they even remotely considering the possibility that her employer would not be able to grant all of the vacation time?

Personally, I wouldn't want to travel internationally

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-28-2005

All that crossed through my mind was.. welcome to the real world!

Tricia