I didn't cave!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2012
I didn't cave!
6
Wed, 11-07-2012 - 10:00pm
  • I almost did something pretty dumb last night. i was watching the election coverage and came very close to sending a text to xAP. Why? I don't know. So foolish. I knew he would be texting about the election and I thought I could send him one. Just a note to say hi. But I thought of you guys and the NC rule and didn't do it.  Are you proud of me? : o)  but I found myself wondering today about him a lot. Like does he ever think about me or wonder how I am? Or do these men just move on and sleep like a baby at night and tey to mend fences with the W while we obsess or cry or try not to think about them? ---True 
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-26-2008
Thu, 11-08-2012 - 12:45pm

Im new to all this and still not able to have NC, but i am working towardst that goal until I no longer love him.  Then I hope to be able to be friends again, since we do work together.  Might take a LONG time though.  He asked me to lunch today and I graciously said HELL NO, but professionally.  For mine, he does get emotional.  He actually looks awful sometimes.  While he says he is crying and sick about the choice he made, in the end, he made it and had many opportunities to change it.  he says he needs to try and be happy....find mental stability again.  He isn't sure if that is with her or me, but he is tryig with her.  whatever!  I do think they miss us, at least whatever it was we provided to them, but I dont think they are as grief stricken as we are, but then again, i am a mess and single now.  he has her there so he isn't totally alone.  I think he struggles too because he has to prove he is trying, so he cant just cry or text me or disappear now to see me without her being suspicious.  But me, when i am ready, i can date, go out, party, bars, theater, whatever.  I am free...he isn't.  I know that is hard on him when he is down.  Hope that helps.  Not many folks on these boards these days........is everyone just getting smarter and not getting into this situation? 

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2011
Sun, 11-11-2012 - 12:51am

It sucks when your xap is your neighbor and see him everyday :(

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2011
Sun, 11-11-2012 - 12:51am

It sucks when your xap is your neighbor and see him everyday :(

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2012
Wed, 11-21-2012 - 9:48am
What is NC?
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2012
Wed, 11-21-2012 - 9:51am
How much did you while "obsess or cry or try not to think about them?" about the guy's wife during the affair?
Community Leader
Registered: 05-23-2003
Tue, 11-27-2012 - 3:08pm

How are you doing True?

Are you still hanging in there?

Hugs,

Kim