I had an affair - need advice please
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|Thu, 11-21-2013 - 9:28am|
I screwed up big time this year and had an affair that started at the beginning of the year. I told my husband I cheated and he said he would try to forgive me which he tried really hard to do so but then we started arguing again and things got really bad again so I went back to the guy I had an affair with for another round. After a few weeks hubby found out I went back again. The reason I had an affair after 15 years of being married is because my husband told me at the beginning of this year he wasn't in love with me anymore. That rattled me to my core and instead of doing the right thing and getting a divorce I decided to have an affair. Well now I have realized that I am completely in love with the guy I had an affair with but I'm too afraid to tell him I'm in love with him. I know my husband is divorcing me which he should since i was the one that cheated on him. I know I messed up by not getting divorced first and believe me karma will get me for that I'm sure but my husband told me he wasn't in love with me anymore and I just lost my mind and needed to know that I could still find a man that would desire me and I did. Problem is I don't think the guy I had an affair with has any clue at all that I'm in love with him. When i just think about him I just smile. He makes my heart smile and makes me feel like I matter in this world. Its really hard to explain but I feel like he is really my soulmate that I have been looking and hoping to find my entire life. Please don't yell at me for having my affair because hubby has beat me up plenty for my mistakes and I know I did a really bad thing but I am not a bad person...really I'm not even if I sound like a witch for what I have done. I did confide in a friend to explain what had happened and my friend said it is a blessing in disguise because of how bad my hubby has treated me all these years like having no problem with me being the bread winner which really bothered me but I had to take care of my family. My friend said if she would have known I was the bread winner all this time she would have told me to divorce him years ago. So please I need advice and please don't yell at me or cut me down anymore I beg you. I really am just lost right now and so in love with my guy I had my affair with.