a very small reality check
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|Thu, 11-15-2012 - 10:53pm|
Okay. So I have sort-of leveled out on revelations, and aha moments (as others stated in another thread)...but I had a very small one this evening. For starters, it has been a long day. I am sick...some sort of cold/fluish thing. I feel tired,whiny,puny...and all around ick. I have gotten through the work week by keeping DayQuill and cough drops in my car..and LOTS of kleenex handy. This evening I came home and H was asleep with our toddler. One teen is out at a concert and the other is studying. My house is abnormally quiet. I slipped into my pajamas, heated up some hot tea..and thought..I'm checking back into the boards. It hit me that I have spent a ridiculous amount of time on these boards recently...but you know what? I'm not hurting anyone when I'm here...me or anyone else. I started thinking about missing xAP..then I thought..no...I really don't. I would much rather be nice and comfy in my temporarily quiet home, surrounded by people who truly care about me..even when I am so charmingly hacking away with ick coming out of every crevice in my face...reading and posting on these boards. I would rather be here than anywhere with xAP...even if I was healthy. THIS is where I want to be. At home...and (sigh) yes..posting;)..and reading. But I needed to realize this..because I get so danged tired of thinking about this whole affair (pun intended)..and wish I could just be free of it..but I'm actually..in some twisted way..enjoying this healing process. So that is it. I'm where I want to be..with all the flaws, hard work and all.
Curious as to what other small (or BIG) revelations and aha moments are happening out there.