Ended it this morning...

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-19-2002
Ended it this morning...
Wed, 03-26-2014 - 12:56pm

I was with someone for 5 months and broke it off about 3 weeks ago. He told me he was separated with divorce pending when we met. Somewhere along the liine that changed, or at least that's what he said. I initially broke it off because i suspected that he and his wife were trying to reconcile. He kept texting me wanting to see me and spend time. We hung out for a couple of weeks.

The other night I accidentally saw a picture of a pair of boobs on his phone while he was searching for something else. After much confronting, he confessed that his wife sent him the picture as a joke for Mardi Gras (beads were involved, they're both from Louisiana, inside joke).

This morning I was finally able to crack the password on his phone (yeah, I know, but you'll see in a minute why). I read a few text exchanges between him and his wife to figure out what's really been going on. Not only were they trying to reconcile, but she knows about his multiple girlfriends.

So after we both finished getting ready for work, I sat him down and told him that last night would be the final night we would spend together. He asked me why. I told him he knows why. No fuss, no muss, no angry exchange. Just a delcaration and a few minutes holding each other and saying goodbye.

I'm ok. I just needed to vent.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2012
Wed, 03-26-2014 - 4:33pm

The very best of luck to you.


Avatar for wClarity
Community Leader
Registered: 11-04-2012
Wed, 03-26-2014 - 5:13pm

I guess that's how separation is suppose to work.  Give them a chance to see if they really miss each other and give them both a little taste of what being separated from each other will really mean and how that might feel. I'm sorry that you did not get the desired outcome.

I admire that you said it is over.  It could not have been easy, but you it did it with grace and dignity...I admire that too.

Post in again if you find that you are not as okay as you thought for support. If you don't feel all that comfortable doing that here, stop by the Ending an Affair Support Board.



Community Leader,

Ending an Affair Support Board

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-19-2002
Wed, 03-26-2014 - 5:59pm

Thanks WC. I must be in a deeper fog than I thought because I could have sworn I posted on the EAS board... LOL


iVillage Member
Registered: 09-19-2002
Wed, 03-26-2014 - 6:59pm

Thanks, Craig.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Thu, 03-27-2014 - 11:42am

A friend of mine got involved with a guy who said that he was separated and it turned out that he was only cheating on his DW.  By the time my friend found out, she said that she should have broken up but she was in love with him.  Eventually the guy's DW found out & kicked him out and they did get divorced and my friend was with this guy for 8 yrs, but she said she could never trust him completely because he started out with a lie.  I think it's good that you would not put up with this behavior.  I am always skeptical when someone tells me he is separated.  I figure that unless the divorce papers are signed and they are just waiting for a court date, they could always get back together.  Who needs that?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-09-2014
Tue, 04-01-2014 - 9:43am
A blessing in disguise. I wish you all the best.