Am i Justified?
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|Thu, 01-15-2009 - 12:26pm|
It has been more than 2 months to my dday. In the beginning i posted on this board got a lot of support from u people and then things got better between... i thought i am getting over the betrayal but something happens and we keep having set backs and i am tired of these set backs...
My H is doing everything i am asking him to do. telling me everything about his affair and answered all my question. my problem is that he is still talking to her for business, daily. he has told me from beginning that he can't end that. And then he shares his days with me, tells me about her(not like when his affair was on, he used to omit her name from all the talks).I try to act calm but inside i am panicking. and then i just let it go most of the times but sometimes i just can't handle it anymore and demand from him that he just throw her out of our lives .... i go mad, angry, tell him that i am not important enough for him to just end all contacts with her. Another thing is that although he hasn't got any personal relations with her anymore but still he feels responsible for her and talks highly of her to me ,like she is a very unselfish person and does all these favors for him and other people.... and all this make me more angry and i want to lash out to him that she is not a good person , if she was not she would have left him immediately after i came to know, in fact she would never have got involved with a married man if she was a good person. But i don't say all these things to him.
he keeps telling me that he committed a BIG mistake ,Why? because he has ruined HER life! Hello , what about me? what about what U did to me?
anyway he believes that because of her difficult situation she is completely alone, without family support and friends , so he thinks he can't leave her, although there is no personal relation.
we have been trying to rebuild for almost 2 months now but i always loose all my focus when i think about both of them talking daily. and right now i have to told him to go to he!! and not come to me till he has thrown her completely out of our lives. his answer is always silence. now we r not talking. and i don't know what he is thinking. if he is thinking i am being unreasonable when he has ended all personal relations with her and is telling me everything.
tell me guys, am i justified ? or am i being a bitch and loosing precious time that i should be using for rebuilding and loving him.