are all men like this???

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-01-2009
are all men like this???
16
Mon, 05-10-2010 - 9:49am

Checking my H phone...A which I still do and probably will for sometime...I see an email on his phone...The email was sent fronm "henry" a married guy my H works with...I actually met "henry" last week..Henry sent an email to my husband that said "I would love to bang Susie".... I thought it was terrible that he would send an email to my H talking about wanting to bang someone other than his wife...Imagine if his wife saw this???????? What is wrong with men!!!!!!!!!!!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-28-2004
Mon, 05-10-2010 - 9:55am
some men just dont think. Its a sad thing to say but an even sadder thing to act upon.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-01-2009
Mon, 05-10-2010 - 10:19am

I have to meet this man's wife and kids in a few weeks!!!! I know guys are attracted to women they see on tv and the street....But do they have to advertise every thought they have!!!!!! Just like at a picnic I went to a few years ago- my H told me about this guy sending dirty photos of himself over the net to other woman...I met his wife and thought geeez I wish you knew what your H was up too!!!!!!! I hope if my H is doing anything someone would tell me!!!!! It is horrible to think that the wife is the last to know..

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-28-2004
Mon, 05-10-2010 - 10:23am

yes thats how some affairs tend to ruin a marriage. Have you talked to your H about your feelings towards this. Even in general about how some married men do these things and how it hurt to other person. how you would feel knowing this of a friend. Maybe it might get him to pull the guy aside and say hey, it almost ruined my marriage and we are still dealing with it.

There are ways to let your feelings known even without the proof you have. Hang in there and hugs.....

I dont know for sure what i would or would not say to this man's wife. but i do know the feelings that can come out of it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-01-2009
Mon, 05-10-2010 - 10:41am

I probably wouldnt say anything to the man or his wife since I do not know them at all.....I only met him once for 5 min...I would leave it to my H to say something to the man......


I will talk to my H...give him the general idea without saying that I saw the email.....I dont want my H knowing I still check up on him....


Words can hurt, I know.,,My husband never physically cheated but his

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-28-2004
Mon, 05-10-2010 - 10:45am

at least you will feel better about seeing this man. Its difficult when you have been there and know what happens. You want to help others. Its not an easy situation. hopefully you H will realize he needs to at least say something since he as been there as well.

You can be discreet, Its quite simple. If you want to go over what you might say to your H let me know. I will be glad to help out if i can. Good luck.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-03-2010
Mon, 05-10-2010 - 12:30pm
What percent of men cheat? I have read as many as 60%...
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2008
Mon, 05-10-2010 - 2:15pm
I've heard that figure too. But I guess that only matters if your H is one of those 60%.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2008
Mon, 05-10-2010 - 3:52pm

When my DH worked with a huge company in high tech, they sometimes got together for beer and cigars after work.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-09-2010
Mon, 05-10-2010 - 6:30pm
Myra - funny you should use the word 'tank' that is the code word H had OW in his phone under. Must be a man thing. Had I been checking it back then, I may have suspected or wondered, I know for sure now I would. I still check phone records of every call, but because my H uses his phone for business too, I can't know all of the numbers, but I do check time, how much time spent talking, repeat calls, you name it. I do. and I probably always will check from time to time. I will not be caught being the last to know again if there should be an again. H even told step daughter he was having an A, can you imagine, and she saw me and couldn't say anything. She tried telling me over and over that I was too good for her father, and would be better off finding someone else that was deserving of me - what a horrible place to put that kid in, she was 25 years old at the time... Just horrible! Sometimes even used her as an excuse that he had
to run over to her house to help with something and I couldn't go.... horrible! They do say that men that hang out with men who condone cheating are more likely to cheat themselves. Funny thing is, my Hs co-worker, the only one he really worked with for years, was always having affairs w/ our secretaries, and gave H the cheap hotel to bring hor to down the block that sold time by the 3 hour blocks..... YUK!! So it does make sense. Hor found him off the internet, just like hor found the others, and co worker covered for him and told him where to go so they didn't have to keep doing it in vans, cars, dirty work shops etc. Went to hotel 3x in 10 months - I made him take me to the parking lot to check it out - boy was he squirming. It was a real lowlife dirty place, just like all the other places they did it. EW!
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2008
Wed, 05-12-2010 - 1:02pm

Haven't seen any replies from the male population to your original question. The answer is YES.

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