To Divorce or Not to Divorce

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-11-2009
To Divorce or Not to Divorce
20
Thu, 04-02-2009 - 3:34am

Hi my name is Kelly I am new to the boards I decided to start my own because there are so many to choose from and I was afraid it would get lost... Anyway I am a 38 yo with 2 kids 18yo boy and 13 yo girl.. I have a grand daughter and a grandson due in 3 weeks.. Due to money issues me and my H separated on June 28 2008 and I will be honest I welcomed it we had lost our house we are in bankruptcy and lost our vehicle. I was heart broken but I snooped a little bit and didn't find any evidence that he was seeing another women or anything like that, We talk everynight like we are still best friends. He has not told me loves me or has made any effort to "try" to fix what is wrong. About 2 wks ago I had a feeling something was up he was acting very different so I went in and check his phone records (which i had not done in a long time) and saw a phone # that was on there any where from 4-7 times a day.. I called it... and it was this women I know we'll call her SH. I am not friends with her but I do know who she is we grew up

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-04-2009
Thu, 04-02-2009 - 10:19am

Kelly, I'm sorry to see you here but you are in the company of people who know what you're going through.

"If something cannot go on forever, it will stop."  Herb Stein

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-08-2008
Thu, 04-02-2009 - 10:19am

Hi Kelly,


saw your post and welcome.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-04-2009
Thu, 04-02-2009 - 11:13am

"If something cannot go on forever, it will stop."  Herb Stein

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2008
Thu, 04-02-2009 - 3:56pm
Oh, that town tramp can appear totally charming and appealing and kind and everything else, my DH sucked himself into an EA with one years ago.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-11-2009
Fri, 04-03-2009 - 12:45am
Wow thank you guys... Myradorn to answer

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2008
Fri, 04-03-2009 - 2:45am

Kaitee, it may very well be there is "nothing BUT an EA going on....", that's the famous last words of MANY of us, myself included.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-11-2009
Fri, 04-03-2009 - 4:11am

You hit the nail on the head with "I'm not even sure some of them are positive they WANT a PA, I think when their crotch starts to twitch they THINK they want it, when down deep maybe - just maybe - some part of them doesn't want it at all, it's like a snowball rolling down the hill." I think you said it PERFECT!!! I think this is what I was trying to say I am 99% sure it is an EA but there is that chance it will be a PA I have told my husband last week.... Dont do something you CANT undo... And when I brought up what a Skank she was he said you dont know her... so she is trying to show him her softer side! I know this women and I thought she was a pretty cool person. Now...... Anyway Thank you!!!


Kelly


God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2008
Sat, 04-04-2009 - 3:45am

Oh, I heard that same crap - you don't know her.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-08-2008
Sat, 04-04-2009 - 11:25am

I agree completely that EA and PA are equally damaging, particularly if either one has had time to develop.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2008
Sat, 04-04-2009 - 7:15pm

Exactly.

 

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