feel like I hate my husband everyday after he cheated

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-07-2014
feel like I hate my husband everyday after he cheated
1
Wed, 05-07-2014 - 7:59pm

I'm wondering if anyone feels the way I do ever since my husband cheated on me I've tried my best to work on our marriage but everyday I feel like he does nothing to fix it and I'm starting to be very mean to him and feel like I hate him any advice would be helpful or just to know I'm not alone with my feelings

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2009

I'm sorry this happened to you.  No one would feel good about their relationship after hearing that their mate cheated.  Not knowing what happened, why it happened,  how long it went on, how you found out, or whether or not it's over......it's hard to say don't "hate" him.  Hate is a strong emotion, and usually the hater is the one that suffers, not the object of the hate.  You say you feel he does nothing to "fix it".  What exactly will "fix it"?  It's impossible to make it "go away".  Has he said he's sorry?  Has he said he'd never do it again?  Do you even know what you want from him at this point?  Nothing will ever change if the two of you don't talk it out, and if you can't talk to each other, then get some counseling.  You don't need to know details, but you DO need to know why he did it.  He may not even KNOW why he did it.  That's why you have to talk to each other.  You can't fix it until you know how and why it was broken.  Again, your "hate" is eating at YOU, a lot more than it is at him.  Hopefully you don't have children, but if you do, you have to keep them OUT of your problem, including not being in a bad mood around them.  No matter what, even if you end up divorcing, he is their father, and they need to respect him as their father.  Kids shoudn't be put in the middle of a problem.  I hope you can work it out and NOT get an ulcer from feeling so miserable.  Good luck on talking to each other or a professional.