Feeling alone.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2003
Feeling alone.
2
Tue, 07-21-2009 - 1:13am
Hi, first time I have posted. I have been married for 15 years. My husband came to me back in May and said he wanted a divorce. He said that I haven't listened to him all these years and he is finished. He said that I don't keep a clean enough house. Yes my house is cluttered at times but is always clean, I have 3 kids. He said that I am a poor money manager and I should have gotten a job a while ago to help. I admit that I am a poor money manager but as for the job we always discussed me going back to work when our youngest was in kindergarten. He starts in the fall. I was going to start to look then. Then he comes to me a few days later and while we were talking about this I asked him if he was seeing someone. He admitted that he slept with someone once but only once. He insisted that it was only the one time and thats all. We decided to wait to tell the kids until they were done school. So he stayed in the house and we kept up appearances. He kept incontact with the other woman but insisted he wasn't seeing her romantically they were only talking. Then we told the kids, he moved out the next week. He saw the woman the evening he moved out. He left earlier than we had discussed. He went straight to meet her. He has been dating her now since leaving. I don't want him back but this hurts. I don't understand why I feel soooo jealous. Today he had to go out of town for work and she went with him. It was just a day trip but it hurts to think that they were together having fun today. It is 11pm and I finally got all three kids to settle. I finally have 2 minutes to myself and he gets to spend the day with his tramp. I am having such a problem with this. I want to teach my kids right from wrong and this is clearly wrong. You don't cheat on your spouse. Am I wrong to think he is showing me such disrespect. We aren't legally separated yet (no paper signed). So far we have been amicable. He is giving me plently of child support and alimony and I get the house. I know he feels guilty. I feel so unwanted. Thanks for letting me vent. I needed to, all of my support network is asleep.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
In reply to: hcbear56
Tue, 07-21-2009 - 9:12am
All of your H's excuses for committing adultery are just that....excuses.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-04-2008
In reply to: hcbear56
Wed, 07-22-2009 - 2:21pm

you have your children who love you no matter what. they are your strength. you have to prove to your husband that you can manage on your own. get a job. read good books about self improvement . you can survive this and end being happier and stronger. Its unfortunate that our husbands do this to us. for a moments pleasure they are willing to throw away the stability and break up our homes