he didnt cheat but I need help forgiving

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2010
he didnt cheat but I need help forgiving
14
Mon, 04-12-2010 - 4:00pm

Hello. I am not sure if this is the right message board, but I need some help getting over an issue.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2010
Mon, 04-12-2010 - 4:08pm
I would say you're over-reacting, but I'm a man.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2010
Mon, 04-12-2010 - 4:23pm

Hi Mike, our sex life is great. we do everything, there are no complaints in that dept!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2010
Mon, 04-12-2010 - 4:27pm

Well, I don't know what to say.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2010
Mon, 04-12-2010 - 4:37pm
I guess WHAT I really want to know, as a guy, do you think him saying it was meaningless and him not even getting hard (i never saw him w a hard on those days he did it) could be true?
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2010
Mon, 04-12-2010 - 4:42pm
That was a period in time when I did have back issues(i was 9 mo pregnant) and maybe that could have been what triggered it since we werent having sex. Ya no issues since, he doesnt seem to have any interest anymore or seem to be hiding anything. I was just hoping it was a random thing, and hoping I shouldnt take it personal. Thx for your help!
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2010
Mon, 04-12-2010 - 5:21pm
It is hard to believe a guy would look at porn and not get a hard-on.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2010
Mon, 04-12-2010 - 6:28pm
Thats EXACTLY what I said..but he said emotionaly it satisfied him, so he stopped thinking about sex after it. I dont know if thats even possible, but I am sure he was too scared to get a hard on knowing I was in the same room at the time...ha
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-28-2004
Tue, 04-13-2010 - 10:04am
welcome to the board. Porn hits hard in some homes. I suggest you talk to him about it and tell him how you feel. maybe the two of you can figure a way to get over this hump you have. Hang in there.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2010
Tue, 04-13-2010 - 11:20am
Hi Missy, thank you. we have talked about it...I have basically talked so much about it its driving us nuts. He has been very respectful about it and isnt going to do it again. He said he truly did it out of boredom and it doesnt mean anything to him.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-28-2004
Tue, 04-13-2010 - 12:03pm
dont feel silly. your welcome here anytime as well.
I know how the internet can ruin so much. Hang in there. Keep those feelings being known. You need to keep working on this its not an overnight change. Hang in there.

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