How to tell friend spouse is cheating

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-19-2006
How to tell friend spouse is cheating
14
Mon, 04-27-2009 - 7:21pm
Hi. Just found out that a coworker is and has been cheating on his wife with the same woman for at least 3 years. I am friends with this woman and don't know how to tell her. Overheard her husband talking to someone else at work. Have heard him make comments in past about staying with wife for the kids sake only and he talks bad about her at times. I want to tell her. I don't want to create bad work situation since I work with her husband who is the cheater. Anyone know a way I can call her without call being traced or the best way to hint for her to find out. I know I can be there for her once she finds out, but her husband is very smooth and if I try to tell her, I think she'll deny it or believe his lies. She needs to discover it herself. Any ideas?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-04-2009
Mon, 04-27-2009 - 11:16pm
She deserves to know and I'd love to tell you how to do that, but I see no way this won't blow up in your face.

"If something cannot go on forever, it will stop."  Herb Stein

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-27-2008
Tue, 04-28-2009 - 12:27am

yes, I agree with thinkingman. You're in a very tough spot. As the victim, I would definately want my friend to tell me but that is just my personal opinion.


I can up with 3 ideas:


1. This may be going off the backend and even a little silly maybe the next time you hear him talking rather profoundly of his wife, you can record

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2002
Tue, 04-28-2009 - 10:09am

I had two friends tell me together, but they made sure they had photos, witnesses and other things to back them up so my now ex-husband couldn't lie his way out of it with so many people coming forward.


 


"OMG, I got engaged, the world will never be the same!...."


&nbs

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-11-2009
Tue, 04-28-2009 - 2:09pm
I disagree with the other posters....this is not your business. If you tell her, I guarantee....this will come back to
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-18-2007
Tue, 04-28-2009 - 2:40pm

The wife is always the last to know, sigh.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2002
Tue, 04-28-2009 - 7:25pm

If my very good friends had made my ex husband's infidelity "none of their business", I never would've done the right thing and gotten away from that game playing loser.


 


"OMG, I got engaged, the world will never be the same!...."


&nbs

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-19-2008
Tue, 04-28-2009 - 7:44pm

My experience also.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2002
Tue, 04-28-2009 - 8:07pm

"She pointed out that she was unhappy to tell me this, but she would want someone to tell her and that was what made her decide to tell me."


That's pretty much what my friends said to me.


 


"OMG, I got engaged, the world will never be the same!...."


&nbs

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-11-2009
Tue, 04-28-2009 - 8:47pm
I am sorry but I still disagree. She may have the facts wrong. I think she should stay out of it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2002
Tue, 04-28-2009 - 9:20pm

I understand your view, but there are no easy, black and white answers to this kind of situation.


 


"OMG, I got engaged, the world will never be the same!...."


&nbs

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