I'm supposed to be planning my wedding...:(

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-25-2004
I'm supposed to be planning my wedding...:(
15
Mon, 02-13-2012 - 4:24pm

I am engaged, and we are planning our wedding.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2012
Mon, 02-13-2012 - 6:31pm

I am so sorry this is happening to you! I wish I had some wise words to share with you. But all I can

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2008
Tue, 02-14-2012 - 2:54am
I am so sorry this happened to you. But look at it this way. Calling off the wedding will be heartbreaking, but not as heartbreaking as finding out he's still doing this AFTER you get married. There is no way you can marry him knowing that you KNOW what he did and is a liar. Of course it's not spam or anyone broke into his account. he he trying deperately to cover his cheating arse. And you have no way of knowing for sure whether he met any of these women for encounters where you live or especially when he was off on travel. Unless he admits what he did you will never trust him. Believe me on this. It won't go away and you will always have this hanging over your head. Sorry but I think as heartbreaking as it is, you KNOW what you have to do.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2008
Tue, 02-14-2012 - 6:56am

Hugs slynn777!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2008
Tue, 02-14-2012 - 11:21am
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2008
Tue, 02-14-2012 - 11:23am
Exactly. He wouldn't have rushed in to his account and deleted the stuff if he did nothing wrong.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-25-2004
Tue, 02-14-2012 - 3:20pm

Thanks all.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2008
Tue, 02-14-2012 - 5:10pm
Yes he definitely owes you some answers.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2012
Tue, 02-14-2012 - 5:21pm

I am so sorry. I am in a similar situation, but 4 years after the wedding...finding porn and that my husband was on dating websites and eventually I found out he was having a 6 month affair. I am here to tell you, DO NOT take this information casually. If I had caught my husband doing these things before we were married I feel like we could have confronted them and he wouldn't have had an affair. You have to confront him and tell him it's not spam and it's not OK, you are not stupid!!! If he chooses to lie to you about it then I hate to say it, but he's probably lying about alot more and maybe he is not ready to be in a committed relationship. If he comes clean and admits he looks at porn and has maybe contacted a few girls then talk through it, draw your boundaries with him...i.e. it's OK to look at porn, but not to contact anyone or whatever you are comfortable with. This is your future. I have a 1 year old with the man who cheated on me and it's been the roughest time of my life trying to repair the damage from his affair so please for your sake don't just brush this off, he needs to know now before you are standing at the alter that you deserve 100% honesty and a full commitment to him and if he's made mistakes then you can deal with that, but honesty has to be there. I wish you the best of luck and I am sorry you are having to deal with this.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-25-2004
Fri, 02-17-2012 - 9:22am

Hi

Thanks very much for your advice.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2008
Fri, 02-17-2012 - 10:37am

(((slynn777)))

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