Not sure what to do anymore...

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-11-2007
Not sure what to do anymore...
2
Mon, 07-12-2010 - 10:54am
Well, I should probably start off by saying that I have known for a number of years that my husband has been unfaithful to me. It started out with him joining dating sites, looking for woman to "chat" with online, but of course it didn't stay that way for long. The chatting became lunch dates, which eventually turned into one night stands (he never met the same woman more then once). And I will admit that I know all of this because I snooped. It was wrong of me, but I knew something was going on and I had to find out. I confronted my husband about it and we had long discussions, etc etc. Things got better for a while, but after a few months he returned to all of his regular dating/sex sites. I tired to ignore it, thinking that I could learn to deal AS LONG as he wasn't sleeping around, and still giving me the attention as well. However in the past few months he has been spending all of his free time on his computer, and I know it's chatting with these women. Most nights he doesn't even come to bed until almost 3am. He won't kiss, hug, touch me, hell I can't even remember the last time he said I love you... I feel like this is truly the end of my marriage. If we didn't have children I know I would have left a long time ago, but now it just doesn't seem that simple. I don't want to stay miserable for the rest of my life, but I don't want to just give up either. Any suggestions?

                                          

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-12-2010
Mon, 07-12-2010 - 12:43pm
I just found out that my H of 3 months has been being what I consider unfaithful all along. He just got caught & in an emotional confession stated that he has been on chat lines, texting, personally calling and receiving photos on his phone all along. He defends himself by stating that he never "touched" any of them & therefore has never been unfaithful. Is this how you think your H sees the continuing contact with others? I have been where you're at in my first marriage. That lasted 17 years. Started the same way, computers, cable porn,
CraftyMom9325
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-13-2010
Tue, 07-13-2010 - 2:08am
haven't you put up with enough? what does he need to do? sleep with another woman in front of you? just because you have kids doesn't mean you have to stay with him, your kids know! they see how unhappy you are! do your kids a favor and divorce this serial cheater before he destroys you! think of your kids! they deserve at least one good parent and that is you, without him! do you want your kids growing up thinking this is how marriage is supposed to work, kids learn from example, you are messing up your kids by staying with this selfish cheater!