a picture says a thousand words

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-01-2009
a picture says a thousand words
Fri, 02-05-2010 - 10:35am

I have posted about my H having boundary issues and his flirty ways.....

I come across this ,morning a picture that was posted onto his Facebook.....A friend of his a girl posted a picture to his facebook..In the picture my H is surrounded by about 4 women..He is sitting while they are standing except for the girl who sent the photo..She is sitting in his lap with her arm around the back of his shoulders and neck.....He of course has a nice big smile on his face.......

I see this photo this morning.........No wonder why I have issues wikth jealousy and insecurity..Who wouldnt.......And I cant imagine he would be too happy if it were me in a photo with a guy sitting on my lap with his arm around the back of my neck..

But of course my H does not have to worry about things like that, because I have very clear boundaries and a level of respect for my H..And i dont need the attention of a million other men to feel validated......I only need my H but clearly de needs to flirt with others.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2008
Fri, 02-05-2010 - 12:15pm
It sound just as you said "that he needs all this attention from other women to feel validated." Maybe you should ask him how he would feel if he found a picture of you siting on a guys lap with your arm around him and with a nice big smile on your face, surrounded by 4 other guys. Your H absolutely has big time BOUNDARY ISSUES. He is not acting like a MM when he is out of your site.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-01-2009
Fri, 02-05-2010 - 1:04pm

Hi...I have tried the what if game with him and it does no good..He always says that he would be fine if I acted and did the same things he does..and of course he has to say he would be fine with it or he would have to addmi he is wrong.

And he is not going to admit he is wrong.

My problem is this..I think he has gotten so comfortable in the marriage that he has become more

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 02-05-2010 - 1:16pm
Your H is continuing
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-16-2008
Fri, 02-05-2010 - 1:58pm

so sorry - I am sure very sure that it just feels awful
talking is getting you nowhere - it has been many months of nowhere
what is the point of being married when you are not getting respect from your SO?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-12-2003
Fri, 02-05-2010 - 10:22pm
So sorry...I can completely relate, in fact I could have written that post myself with the exception that I don't have a picture, my husband just loves to flirt with other women and talk about me to them. I wish I had some words of wisdom, or some wonderful advice...but I don't...I can only offer hugs because I completely understand...