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|Fri, 08-15-2014 - 1:30pm|
My dance teacher asked to talk to me over the weekend--she told me that her DH was having an affair with a female dance student. I was very shocked. The reason she told me is that I am a divorce lawyer and she was asking for some legal advice, but because we are friends she told me a lot of personal details. Her DH had gone away 2 weekends ago to go camping--he has not been himself lately and told her he was unsure about staying together, unsure about his job, etc. So last weekend, she got up to find a note that he needed to go away (again) for the weekend--he did not tell her where he was going but I guess she looked for credit cards and found out he had gone to a Caribbean island for 4 days. she called the woman suspect's office (she also happens to be a divorce lawyer and is single) and found out from the secretary the "OW" was also on vacation--on the same island. Plus there were various other things that made her suspicious, like the fact that her DH would just go off at night and come home late, not answer his cell phone and not say where he was.
So he came home and then she called me the next day to say that she confronted him and he said he was not having an affair with anybody and not in particular with this woman and everything was ok and she had to tell me because she was sorry that she "dragged the woman's name through the mud." There is only one other mutual friend who she told because this friend would go to church every week with the woman & her DH and when the DH stopped going to church finally the woman had to say something. So in the phone convo, my friend was like "I know my DH> I believe him when he said he didn't have an affair." Now I figure it is not my business to insert myself into their marriage. I know my friend doesn't want to get a divorce so she is probably willing to believe whatever he says as long as he decides to stay married so if they make up and are happy, then I am happy for them. But I still don't believe it! I think it's just such a wierd coincidence that the guy and the OW just happened to go to the same island at the same time, plus with all the other odd behavior going on that does look suspicious. The mutual friend doesn't believe it either--her ex cheated on her and then left her for the OW and the guy's behavior just reminds her a lot of what her ex used to do. I just think that fine, if you are confused about life and need some time to yourself, then wouldn't you just say to your spouse just that--I need to be away for a few days to thing thinks out--here is where I will be and you can reach me on my phone in an emergency (mind you the wife's parents are elderly and sick, so maybe they could die at any time and she wouldn't even be able to reach him). If everything is so innocent, why would he not tell her where he is going and why not just go camping or go to somewhere close by that is not expensive? They have less income coming in because he is sick and has been unable to work so he is spending money they can't afford on a tropical vacation--is that something that you do if you only need to think? It's summer and we live near the beaches so he can go to the beach, go sailing or those kind of things right near where we live--why take a plane to somewhere by himself?